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Suspicious Plants at Walmart (Surviving Walmart Series)

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In April 2010 the European Grapevine Moth was discovered in the beautiful rift valley of Ukiah, California. The suspected source was produce trucks left overnight in infested areas of Hopland. At the same time, the powerful story you are about to read was unfolding. Ironically, I wrote this entire story ignorant of the fact that the infestation had already begun. During t In April 2010 the European Grapevine Moth was discovered in the beautiful rift valley of Ukiah, California. The suspected source was produce trucks left overnight in infested areas of Hopland. At the same time, the powerful story you are about to read was unfolding. Ironically, I wrote this entire story ignorant of the fact that the infestation had already begun. During that summer I thought I witnessed violations of plant shipment quarantine and inspection requirements. These rules are in place to help slow the spread of non-native invasive fauna and flora. My story suggests the EGVM may have been brought into the Ukiah Valley through this preventable negligence. This true story is a record of the day to day events as I tried to navigate the maze of protocol and corporate bureaucracy to find answers to my questions. This has to be true, no one could make this story up. After you read this book you may never see Walmart or their Associates the same way again. I tried to describe people and events as precisely as I saw them, despite the fact that there is always a difference between what we see and what is actually real. Since laughter is perhaps the most important thing in my life, I saturated this book with as much humor as possible. Enjoy these samples from the book: “OH MY GOD!” An Associate at the next table wailed. “They cut my hours so much, my next paycheck won't be enough to cover my health insurance premium. I’ll owe Walmart money for working.” She held her face in her hands as the tears streamed out from between her fingers. I walked into the Outdoor Living Room to find birds pecking holes in the tops of the Ramen noodles and breakfast cereal boxes, again. Bird droppings are sprinkled all over the merchandise to be sold. This can't be a good thing. It would be nice to have indoor storage for a lot of the stuff we sell. Out here everything gets exposed to the elements and the animals. “How do you think someone does when they get their hours cut in half,” she replied as she slammed an item into a cart. “Oh, no!” the customer gasped. “Look, forget it. This isn't worth the hassle.” The customer abandoned her cart and items at Maggie’s register and stormed toward me and the door. I conjured up the most sympathetic look I could, and smiled valiantly as the lady approached. She stopped just inches from me, pointed her finger back at Maggie, The Cashier From Hell, and yelled, “THAT WOMAN SUCKS THE LIFE OUT OF YOU!!” I knew I was sending the fox to watch the hen-house, but I wasn't sure what was happening. I wanted to see if Walmart would do what's right without being told to do so by a government agency. Well, what a surprise; The fox took care of the problem in the hen house. It still amazes me just how naïve I was, when I look back on this moment. As of this writing, five months after we received the EGVM procedure from the County, I have not seen an authorized green waste container, or a plant identification book anywhere. Here was a Chinese man complaining that he didn't want to buy anything made in China. And every time he complained something was made in China, I felt like saying “But, so were you!” “ATTENTION ALL ASSOCIATES, we have a Code Adam. It is a little boy wearing blue jeans and a yellow pullover shirt." "You really are a beautiful man," Creepy Slim said. Just then, another drug addict came out of the store and walked past me. This addict wears a nice shirt and tie. He is the newest assistant manager Jansen, and he's demonstrating to all the children one of Walmart's best products, the cigarette.


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In April 2010 the European Grapevine Moth was discovered in the beautiful rift valley of Ukiah, California. The suspected source was produce trucks left overnight in infested areas of Hopland. At the same time, the powerful story you are about to read was unfolding. Ironically, I wrote this entire story ignorant of the fact that the infestation had already begun. During t In April 2010 the European Grapevine Moth was discovered in the beautiful rift valley of Ukiah, California. The suspected source was produce trucks left overnight in infested areas of Hopland. At the same time, the powerful story you are about to read was unfolding. Ironically, I wrote this entire story ignorant of the fact that the infestation had already begun. During that summer I thought I witnessed violations of plant shipment quarantine and inspection requirements. These rules are in place to help slow the spread of non-native invasive fauna and flora. My story suggests the EGVM may have been brought into the Ukiah Valley through this preventable negligence. This true story is a record of the day to day events as I tried to navigate the maze of protocol and corporate bureaucracy to find answers to my questions. This has to be true, no one could make this story up. After you read this book you may never see Walmart or their Associates the same way again. I tried to describe people and events as precisely as I saw them, despite the fact that there is always a difference between what we see and what is actually real. Since laughter is perhaps the most important thing in my life, I saturated this book with as much humor as possible. Enjoy these samples from the book: “OH MY GOD!” An Associate at the next table wailed. “They cut my hours so much, my next paycheck won't be enough to cover my health insurance premium. I’ll owe Walmart money for working.” She held her face in her hands as the tears streamed out from between her fingers. I walked into the Outdoor Living Room to find birds pecking holes in the tops of the Ramen noodles and breakfast cereal boxes, again. Bird droppings are sprinkled all over the merchandise to be sold. This can't be a good thing. It would be nice to have indoor storage for a lot of the stuff we sell. Out here everything gets exposed to the elements and the animals. “How do you think someone does when they get their hours cut in half,” she replied as she slammed an item into a cart. “Oh, no!” the customer gasped. “Look, forget it. This isn't worth the hassle.” The customer abandoned her cart and items at Maggie’s register and stormed toward me and the door. I conjured up the most sympathetic look I could, and smiled valiantly as the lady approached. She stopped just inches from me, pointed her finger back at Maggie, The Cashier From Hell, and yelled, “THAT WOMAN SUCKS THE LIFE OUT OF YOU!!” I knew I was sending the fox to watch the hen-house, but I wasn't sure what was happening. I wanted to see if Walmart would do what's right without being told to do so by a government agency. Well, what a surprise; The fox took care of the problem in the hen house. It still amazes me just how naïve I was, when I look back on this moment. As of this writing, five months after we received the EGVM procedure from the County, I have not seen an authorized green waste container, or a plant identification book anywhere. Here was a Chinese man complaining that he didn't want to buy anything made in China. And every time he complained something was made in China, I felt like saying “But, so were you!” “ATTENTION ALL ASSOCIATES, we have a Code Adam. It is a little boy wearing blue jeans and a yellow pullover shirt." "You really are a beautiful man," Creepy Slim said. Just then, another drug addict came out of the store and walked past me. This addict wears a nice shirt and tie. He is the newest assistant manager Jansen, and he's demonstrating to all the children one of Walmart's best products, the cigarette.

28 review for Suspicious Plants at Walmart (Surviving Walmart Series)

  1. 4 out of 5

    Ann237

    Document Reading this book reminds me of advice I gave a few friends that were in tough situations with their jobs. Document, document, document. Because when the SHTF and sooner or latter it will, it always does, you have what you need. BUT the book sadly rated the way it did because of the same reason that even when you are right about something, and others are clearly wrong. You have spoken to all the powers to be, plus even a few more. You have done your job! To continue to beat the dead hors Document Reading this book reminds me of advice I gave a few friends that were in tough situations with their jobs. Document, document, document. Because when the SHTF and sooner or latter it will, it always does, you have what you need. BUT the book sadly rated the way it did because of the same reason that even when you are right about something, and others are clearly wrong. You have spoken to all the powers to be, plus even a few more. You have done your job! To continue to beat the dead horse, causes animosity & the more time talking about what's not being done by others is incising a more hostile environment. Walmart is a company that has gotten rich on the American Dream-of others- turning those dreams to nightmares. Taking homes & land by imminent domain , to build a Walmart just to close down a few years later to open a bigger one 2 miles down the Rd. The author mentioned about their scheduling & pay along with benefit practices. It is no secret that Walmart employees are the most employed group to collect Medicare, welfare because they are unable to provide for their families and the co does not help. The book told of more foul practices of store, hopefully it will

  2. 4 out of 5

    EvilWebBoy

    Suspicious Plants at Walmart by Ron Bergeron This had an Office Space (For Retail Employees) vibe to it. It was cool seeing behind the curtain at Wal-Mart! I didn't work at Wal-Mart but most retailers have similar stories. It's basically a revenge book about Wal-Mart associate Ron Bergeron (The author) and his manager Gary. It could have easily been named the things my manager Gary does wrong, since the European Grapevine Moth never actually makes an appearance in Wal-Mart. Suspicious Plants at Walmart by Ron Bergeron This had an Office Space (For Retail Employees) vibe to it. It was cool seeing behind the curtain at Wal-Mart! I didn't work at Wal-Mart but most retailers have similar stories. It's basically a revenge book about Wal-Mart associate Ron Bergeron (The author) and his manager Gary. It could have easily been named the things my manager Gary does wrong, since the European Grapevine Moth never actually makes an appearance in Wal-Mart.

  3. 4 out of 5

    Stephanie Turner

    Heart breaking I, too, was a Wal-Mart associate. What Ron had written regarding Wal-Mart is absolutely true. I had to quit Wal-Mart because of health reasons that was due to Wal-Mart actions. This is truly a hell hole. Never again

  4. 5 out of 5

    Elaine

    The author makes many valid points and knows what he’s talking about. Since no one seemed to want to do anything, I’m glad to see this guy took the initiative to contact AG himself. He makes a great point how Walmart sells cigarettes and then profits in the sales of products to counter its ill effects including cough suppressants, nicotine gum and patches, and sundry other products. Self-proclaimed tree-hugger Ron makes his point with his manager Gary when he (Gary) dumps his soda on the ground The author makes many valid points and knows what he’s talking about. Since no one seemed to want to do anything, I’m glad to see this guy took the initiative to contact AG himself. He makes a great point how Walmart sells cigarettes and then profits in the sales of products to counter its ill effects including cough suppressants, nicotine gum and patches, and sundry other products. Self-proclaimed tree-hugger Ron makes his point with his manager Gary when he (Gary) dumps his soda on the ground outside the store. He then launches in on how he handled the plant inspection problem and tells him all the ways Gary has disappointed him. It’s good at times to document troublesome events, however it usually isn’t the most prudent idea to dump them on someone’s head and at his feet in one fell swoop. I kept hearing the word “You” starting many sentences in his “blizzard of criticism” as the author calls his harangue with the department head. Again, he had valid points and I’m not going to argue that. It’s the accusatory tone with never a nice word, that would have had the bravest cowering for cover or scrambling for revenge. To the author: Thanks for writing this.

  5. 5 out of 5

    Ellen

    This was incredibly boring, and basically a run-down of what the author did every day at Walmart (where he works) for about two weeks, with a bit of a plot. The author is also an asshole. Sample passage, starting with a conversation with his manager, Gregg: "Hey Ron, what's up?" "Wha'd you have for lunch?" "Nothing special, just a little prime rib," he said as if trying to downplay it. The ribs weren't the only thing that was prime. His obesity made him a prime candidate for diabetes and heart dise This was incredibly boring, and basically a run-down of what the author did every day at Walmart (where he works) for about two weeks, with a bit of a plot. The author is also an asshole. Sample passage, starting with a conversation with his manager, Gregg: "Hey Ron, what's up?" "Wha'd you have for lunch?" "Nothing special, just a little prime rib," he said as if trying to downplay it. The ribs weren't the only thing that was prime. His obesity made him a prime candidate for diabetes and heart disease. Gregg's obesity was unique. Instead of the typical waist bulge that fills the middle, his fat bulge was oriented up and down. It started very high up in his chest, just beneath the solar plexus, and extended down to hang over his straining belt. Since he was nearly seven feet tall, his fat bulge looked even longer and stranger. Somewhat like space shuttle heat tiles, he looks like he could sled fin from space protected by his fat shield. The multi-tiered waddle hanging from his chin, flopping back and forth with each movement of his head, was difficult to ignore while talking with him. He had more chins than a Chinese phone book. Seriously, the whole book is like this.

  6. 5 out of 5

    Maria

  7. 4 out of 5

    Melinda Mae Miller

  8. 4 out of 5

    John

  9. 5 out of 5

    Jason

  10. 5 out of 5

    Steve

  11. 4 out of 5

    Bethany

  12. 5 out of 5

    Dawn

  13. 5 out of 5

    Ide

  14. 5 out of 5

    Barb

  15. 4 out of 5

    T. Rose

  16. 4 out of 5

    Heidi

  17. 5 out of 5

    H

  18. 5 out of 5

    Sarah Bollt

  19. 4 out of 5

    Janet Graham

  20. 5 out of 5

    Sharon

  21. 5 out of 5

    Tawnya

  22. 5 out of 5

    Toni Clark

  23. 5 out of 5

    Jessica

  24. 5 out of 5

    Shari

  25. 4 out of 5

    Jessie Morris

  26. 4 out of 5

    Julia Harper

  27. 4 out of 5

    susan young bucy

  28. 5 out of 5

    Linda Carey

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