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The Drought

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Dan Hilles is a pretty regular kind of guy - regular job, regular bunch of mates, regular male aversion to shopping. But following his break-up with long-term girlfriend, Stacey, he finds himself single again. He's been out of the game for a while and is a little out of practice. Soon, the very irregular and increasingly worrying issue in Dan's life is the extended drought Dan Hilles is a pretty regular kind of guy - regular job, regular bunch of mates, regular male aversion to shopping. But following his break-up with long-term girlfriend, Stacey, he finds himself single again. He's been out of the game for a while and is a little out of practice. Soon, the very irregular and increasingly worrying issue in Dan's life is the extended drought he finds himself suffering. And we're not talking the climate change, scorched earth, God I'm parched variety. You've got to hand it to Dan though - it certainly isn't from a lack of trying. With stalwart mates Ollie, Jack and Rob on hand to lend their collective pearls of male wisdom and arrange the odd road trip, you'd think Dan's days of languishing in a sexual wilderness would be numbered. Even best friends can't help prevent the kind of surreal holes Dan just can't seem to help digging himself into. And with each failed attempt, his self-esteem plummets to the point where he wonders if 'little Dan' will ever work again. Good job he has Kelly, his reliable and sympathetic colleague, to confide in. As a woman, she can perhaps shed some female light on why he's failing so miserably with the opposite sex, balancing out the testosterone-fuelled 'advice' from the lads. Surely Dan can't go wrong with Kelly teaching him the various intricacies of a woman's mind. Steven Scaffardi's first novel will have every guy laughing out loud in recognition and every girl secretly worrying - is this how men really think? A new talent to watch out for on the 'lad-lit' scene.


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Dan Hilles is a pretty regular kind of guy - regular job, regular bunch of mates, regular male aversion to shopping. But following his break-up with long-term girlfriend, Stacey, he finds himself single again. He's been out of the game for a while and is a little out of practice. Soon, the very irregular and increasingly worrying issue in Dan's life is the extended drought Dan Hilles is a pretty regular kind of guy - regular job, regular bunch of mates, regular male aversion to shopping. But following his break-up with long-term girlfriend, Stacey, he finds himself single again. He's been out of the game for a while and is a little out of practice. Soon, the very irregular and increasingly worrying issue in Dan's life is the extended drought he finds himself suffering. And we're not talking the climate change, scorched earth, God I'm parched variety. You've got to hand it to Dan though - it certainly isn't from a lack of trying. With stalwart mates Ollie, Jack and Rob on hand to lend their collective pearls of male wisdom and arrange the odd road trip, you'd think Dan's days of languishing in a sexual wilderness would be numbered. Even best friends can't help prevent the kind of surreal holes Dan just can't seem to help digging himself into. And with each failed attempt, his self-esteem plummets to the point where he wonders if 'little Dan' will ever work again. Good job he has Kelly, his reliable and sympathetic colleague, to confide in. As a woman, she can perhaps shed some female light on why he's failing so miserably with the opposite sex, balancing out the testosterone-fuelled 'advice' from the lads. Surely Dan can't go wrong with Kelly teaching him the various intricacies of a woman's mind. Steven Scaffardi's first novel will have every guy laughing out loud in recognition and every girl secretly worrying - is this how men really think? A new talent to watch out for on the 'lad-lit' scene.

30 review for The Drought

  1. 4 out of 5

    Dd

    "It gives me great pleasure to award the Guinness World Record for the longest period without sex to Mr Daniel Hilles,” the adjudicator proudly announces to the crowd in an annoying nasal monotone accent. Polite applause starts up as he continues. “Mr Hilles has not come into contact with the female genitalia for two months, eclipsing the previous record held by 97-year-old Hubert Grayson.” In case all of you are wondering who is this Daniel Hilles....Readers,he is our hero!! And no,no,don't worry "It gives me great pleasure to award the Guinness World Record for the longest period without sex to Mr Daniel Hilles,” the adjudicator proudly announces to the crowd in an annoying nasal monotone accent. Polite applause starts up as he continues. “Mr Hilles has not come into contact with the female genitalia for two months, eclipsing the previous record held by 97-year-old Hubert Grayson.” In case all of you are wondering who is this Daniel Hilles....Readers,he is our hero!! And no,no,don't worry.What you read above was just his nightmare....well atleast the Guinness World Record part. And as for the no sex for two months...that's just the beginning!! -------------------------------------------------------------- So, by now you can well understand what kind of DROUGHT this is and that our hero is dying for a little feminine attention. Now Readers,you will not be able to guess all the things he had to suffer while trying to get some!! Sometimes his manhood was threatened,and sometimes his very life.Sometimes he got labelled as a paedophile and sometimes as a blackmailer.And one particular time Readers,he was nationally labelled as gay. So you can well understand what he had to go through!! So this book is basically all about this special drought in Daniel's life. ------------------------------------------------------------ All that said,this was my first lad-lit and I liked it.It was sweet and funny. (The hero was a bit childish and the story dragged on a bit,but I could easily overlook that.!!) --3.5 stars-- That's all for now,Readers. Ta-Ta!! **copy provided by the author in exchange of an honest review**

  2. 4 out of 5

    Mark

    Where to begin ? I am 49, can't bear football, cry regularly at soppy films and moving books, am very in touch with my feminine side and am quite happily ensconced a little to the left of the neutral line when extreme right is hetero Neanderthal and extreme left is Julian Clary so I would have to say that i am not quite the target audience for this book. The four main characters are horrible. The 'hero' is a whiney, self-obsessed tosser who breaks up with his girlfriend on New Year's Eve/Day and Where to begin ? I am 49, can't bear football, cry regularly at soppy films and moving books, am very in touch with my feminine side and am quite happily ensconced a little to the left of the neutral line when extreme right is hetero Neanderthal and extreme left is Julian Clary so I would have to say that i am not quite the target audience for this book. The four main characters are horrible. The 'hero' is a whiney, self-obsessed tosser who breaks up with his girlfriend on New Year's Eve/Day and then proceeds to go into meltdown because he does not get his 'end away' just four days later whilst seeking to pick up a girl collecting for charity. The rest of the book is about his journey to Sexville, County Sex, in the Country of Sexlandia on the Continent of....well you get my drift. Rob, his best mate, is handsome, fit, wealthy (he thinks 1400 pounds for a blazer is worth the money because of its brand name)and can not fail to pick up any girl to whom he flashes his winning smile or flutters his, probably, plucked and moisturized eyelids. Jack.............APPALLING, APPALLING,APPALLING. He is literally a 'jack the lad' with loads of ridiculous one line chat ups, an irrepressible ego and libido who everyone, it seems, finds the life and soul of any party....how we all laughed at Jack's wit....eh yeah ok. Olly is thick, and I mean really thick, and is also big and muscley and therefore comes into his own whenever the four lads find themselves in sticky situations normally, and I am open to correction here, but normally because they deserve to have the sh**e kicked out of them because they are a bunch of insensitive, immature and totally self obsessed wankers. Ok, so those are the main dramatis personnae. There is one girl, Kelly, who is as much of a bloke as Dan our anti-hero. She laughs and chuckles at his escapades and the 'high-jinx' of the 'Big Guns' as they at one point embarrassingly call themselves. She appears to think it perfectly ok to sleep around, lie, cheat on and humiliate people (the plain geek in their shared office has a practical joke played on him which gets him publicly humiliated and arrested). All other girls are there to move the plot along which involves Dan failing miserably to get his leg over.....girls, it seems, are really turned off when a bloke says he wants to make love to them. My big problem with the book was not the writing which was funny and swift moving and, although some of the incidents and resolutions were telegraphed so far ahead that i could guess way before they happened, Scaffardi creates some really clever situations in which to humiliate his hero; no my problem was I kept hoping that i was supposed to find the four blokes total idiots and that I was supposed to laugh at their arrogance and lack of self knowledge, that Dan was a totally unreliable narrator but at the end of the book I am not sure. His behaviour on the last page suggests none of his previous nine months experience has made an iota of difference to him. He hasn't grown at all, all that has happened(view spoiler)[ is he has finally delivered sperm....hurrah. (hide spoiler)] And that is really not a spoiler cos it is so obvious. All four of the main men remain as they were, well with the exception of the above spoiler. Olly remains thick and rather neanderthal and patronized, Rob remains up his own no doubt well muscled and clothed arse and Jack,,..............well nuff said about him. I could not like these boys if they came and begged me to, they were horrible and slimy and foul, it is probably my age but, as I said in my update earlier, if any of these blokes came checking out my nieces I would put my pacifist credentials aside for however long it took to beat some sort of humanity into these misshapen lusts on legs. Dan's father is absolutley no better with his frankly appalling advice re getting or not getting a girl pregnant but i do not want to wade my way through all these characters suffice it to say I found the whole social network painted for me quite horrendous. Dan was at such pains to tell us what real men were all about and the rules of being a bloke and a friend etc etc and how he was so not gay that METHINKS THE LADY DOTH PROTEST TOO MUCH sprang proudly like Rudolph Nureyev into my mind. Jack with his simulation of doggy style sex on his mate, Rob handing out sequin encrusted purses and calling it a 'bad boy' ,no he really did, and Olly giving Dan the rundown on things you should and shouldn't say in the gym..........oh in the Name of all that's Holy.....GAY. Maybe this is Steven Scaffardi's cunning plan, to show that these four studs are nothing more then four boys too cowardly to face up to the truth of their homosexuality and thus take refuge in the age old disguise of mysogyny and belittling of women. Dan has not a respectful bone (excuse the double entendre) in his body for women, gays or anyone really except blacks. For some strange reason there is one incident where Olly, the thick muscley one, decides to approach a black girl with the line that he has never had a black girl and maybe this will pay off. Dan is outraged by this, this will offend, this will upset, this is unacceptable............riiiiight, ok. So belittle and make fun of every women because she is ugly, fat, shy, has medical conditions but do not, under any circumstances, mention to a black girl that you would like to have sex with her becasue she is black. Now don't get me wrong, i do think that would be appallingly crass and offensive and rude but my point is I do not understand where Dan's high-minded feeling comes from on this. He is a total arse about every other situation. Anyway, as you see I loathed these men in every way possible and if, as i hope, Scaffardi was wanting us to find them prats and immature and emminently punchable then he has done his job wonderfully. If i am free to really dislike these men then there is a lot I can enjoy, Scaffardi has created a well drawn picture of a pointless and gutless group of men who will, one hopes, one day grow up and perhaps these experiences will be something they will cringe out of and flourish but in the back of my mind lurks a horrible fear that I am supposed to admire these men for their 'joie de vivre' or 'devil may care' attitudes and if this is the case then i have to say, Thank God I am over their hill and faraway. As I said at the beginning I am quite clearly not the target audience so I will leave it with praise for Scaffardi's imagination and word play. Loathsome though they are, the four men are, if not exactly individualized in their dialogue, clear characters though still maybe rather cliched. It is a funny, easy and a cleverly constructed novel but if it is a rule book or a guide to real life.....God help Britain Concept and structure...4, Wordplay ...3/4, Main characters......so -1 ps. I appreciate Steven Scaffardi sending me a copy but even more so I respect his being happy for me to put this review up but as I said I am really not the target audience for SO many reasons but it is always fun to read books that you would not necessarily choose for yourself, that is why bookclubs flourish I would guess. However, though my bookclub here is quite adventurous in its choice of reading matter I think, if Steve is happy, I might not suggest this volume .

  3. 4 out of 5

    Melki

    While it doesn't quite rank up there with Portnoy’s Complaint, 'The Dr♂ught' is one of the more enjoyable books I've read on the subject of Man's never ending quest to get laid. Dan has just ended his relationship with his girlfriend of three years, and boy, is he out of practice in the ways of wooing and winning women. As the dry spell stretches from days to months, he attempts to get back in the saddle again, but always, always, some hilarious something - jealous boyfriends, vicious dogs, nause While it doesn't quite rank up there with Portnoy’s Complaint, 'The Dr♂ught' is one of the more enjoyable books I've read on the subject of Man's never ending quest to get laid. Dan has just ended his relationship with his girlfriend of three years, and boy, is he out of practice in the ways of wooing and winning women. As the dry spell stretches from days to months, he attempts to get back in the saddle again, but always, always, some hilarious something - jealous boyfriends, vicious dogs, nausea, a lack of "Randy van Warmers" - prevents him from getting his ashes hauled. This reminds me so much of one of the naughtier Britcoms like 'The Inbetweeners' or 'Pulling'; those guilty pleasure shows that I watch where part of me is saying, "You know, you should NOT be finding this funny!" and another part of me is saying, "But, I do. I do!" So, have fun with this flirty book that guarantees a happy ending...in every sense of the word.

  4. 5 out of 5

    Rossy

    I laughed out loud at some of the adventures and situations Dan has throughout his "Drought", some of them were a little implausible, but nonetheless really fun! It was a light read, entertaining, and I haven't heard before the term "lad-lit" before! I'm giving it 3 stars because I wasn't satisfied with the ending and I didn't care too much for any of the characters, I felt Dan and his friends were kind of jerks, fun jerks obviously, lol. I laughed out loud at some of the adventures and situations Dan has throughout his "Drought", some of them were a little implausible, but nonetheless really fun! It was a light read, entertaining, and I haven't heard before the term "lad-lit" before! I'm giving it 3 stars because I wasn't satisfied with the ending and I didn't care too much for any of the characters, I felt Dan and his friends were kind of jerks, fun jerks obviously, lol.

  5. 5 out of 5

    Seena Seena

    "It was like Take That turning up at a Black Panther Party convention." Absolutely friken loved that. This was my first ever experience reading lad-lit.... Sorry, the word lad-lit seems like such a naughty word it makes me giggle! I feel as though it should be used describing a porno.... ANYWAY! Me and my husband made a deal. If I go on 1 fishing trip with him, he would stop hassling me about my purchases from Amazon for a month. After much heated negotiations it ended up being 2 and a half mont "It was like Take That turning up at a Black Panther Party convention." Absolutely friken loved that. This was my first ever experience reading lad-lit.... Sorry, the word lad-lit seems like such a naughty word it makes me giggle! I feel as though it should be used describing a porno.... ANYWAY! Me and my husband made a deal. If I go on 1 fishing trip with him, he would stop hassling me about my purchases from Amazon for a month. After much heated negotiations it ended up being 2 and a half months no bitching and moaning about my expenditure on amazon. So we packed the car and off we went. I arrived at the destination and pulled out my Kindle (did not tell him I would actually fish!!) And thought The Drought would be the perfect book to read while my husband attempted to catch a fish. I am so glad I read this book. Anyone who enjoys a good laugh and cringe worthy moments must read this book. The shit these fellas get up too is so unbelievably stupid but yet so endearing. "I have a rule I lived by - no white man should dance to RnB, unless you are Michael Jackson of course." This book was just so easy to read, before I knew it I had devoured it and I was left wanting more. I wanted to see more of Dan (The normal - well as normal as you can get), Rob (The metro sexual hottie), Jack (The one liner pervert) & Ollie (The big muscly idiot). I wanted to laugh some more over their antics and also really BAD advice that left me thinking "Seriously guys say these things?" See I believe we females are creatures that would never be cracked. We are hard to live with and understand but these boys HAD NO CLUE which leads Dan into some serious laugh out loud moments. So everyone (especially ladies) pick up this funny read and allow your self to be pleasantly surprised! "You spent six weeks in a mental institution...." I hesitated to finish, not quite believing I would ever utter this sentence to anyone. ".....because you suffered from fanny farts?"

  6. 4 out of 5

    David Baird

    First let me say this.. I don’t think I’ve ever smiled as much or laughed as hard as I did reading this book, multiple times a had to cover me face to stop the laugh coming out while on public transport. This book follows Dan and his numerous disasters in the dating world. Although I felt for the guy I couldn’t help but laugh at the events that played out. One of the best things about the book for me was that the author hit dead on with the events, so much so that it reminded me of my own life at First let me say this.. I don’t think I’ve ever smiled as much or laughed as hard as I did reading this book, multiple times a had to cover me face to stop the laugh coming out while on public transport. This book follows Dan and his numerous disasters in the dating world. Although I felt for the guy I couldn’t help but laugh at the events that played out. One of the best things about the book for me was that the author hit dead on with the events, so much so that it reminded me of my own life at points during my late teens/early twenties. I identified with the characters and could see a lot of my own friend’s personalities in Dan’s friends. The book is well written and funny and is told at a good pace. I found myself getting to the end of a chapter and pausing to take in the events, chuckle some more and review the events that have played out in my own life For me this was a very honest tale of a young man, recently single looking to get his end away, he’s not looking to hurt anyone and I’d like to think most men will identify with that. Overall the book was brilliantly funny and spot on with the comedy, made up of funny events and some very cringy ones that will leave you with a smile on your face. When I first heard about this book I did wonder if it was better suited to a male audience and thanks to my friend Sarah @ bytheletterbookreviews I’m very glad to say she found it just as funny as me. …. And I definitely agree with Sarah’s comment that this would a brilliant TV show If you’re looking for a fun read this is definitely one to pick up! My thanks go to Steven for the opportunity to read/review the book. I’m half way through the follow up book ‘The Food’ and can tell you so far it hasn’t disappointed.. just as funny and I’m dying to read more.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Liz

    It was funny and entertaining. Guys can be gross, but so can the girls. No one wins. Here, have a self sex.

  8. 4 out of 5

    Kellie Maddox-Ward

    I decided that little Dan had been punished enough, and he had a long overdue date with Palmala Handerson The art of masturbation is a skill that does not get the press it deserves. With no visual or audio aid to assist, a true pro-stoker will take a dip into the resource pool that is the wank bank; in this particular case the hot red-head who sat opposite me on the bus Thursday evening. - Dan's inner thought Wow this story was just... piss your pants funny. I received a message from the aut I decided that little Dan had been punished enough, and he had a long overdue date with Palmala Handerson The art of masturbation is a skill that does not get the press it deserves. With no visual or audio aid to assist, a true pro-stoker will take a dip into the resource pool that is the wank bank; in this particular case the hot red-head who sat opposite me on the bus Thursday evening. - Dan's inner thought Wow this story was just... piss your pants funny. I received a message from the author asking if I would read it for an honest review. Honestly I had heard of "Lad-Lit" before but haven't read any. Well it was bloody fantastic and will be reading more! I love my high heels and girly cocktails, but at heart I am a girl with boobs as my mates say. I swear like a sailor, belch the alphabet for dares, drink beer, bet on the horses/dogs/anything really, watch sports, laugh at fart jokes, watch action movies so this book was RIGHT UP MY ALLEY! They should make a movie out of this book. I would be all over that shit! Ok the Story... We meet Dan while he's at a pub 255 days, 23 hrs, 50 minutes into his drought. He's extremely drunk and horny and hits on the bartender... doesn't work for him so he starts to tell us the story of what happened to get him where he is. How had it come to this? I used to be a pretty cool guy. Perhaps not the coolest, but I got by. Now look at me - lying on my back in a stinking old pub, beaten up by a girl. And to cap it all off I still had a semi hard on from where I was staring at her tits. So then we go back to the start (happens to be new years day) and we meet Dan's girlfriend Stacey and his best friends Rob, Ollie and Jack. We see the break up that Dan desperately needed, cos Stacey was a bitch! oh and a psycho! and how Rob, Jack and Ollie are super excited that Dan is single again and he is going to pull so much.... That doesn't happen (obviously from the name of the book!) but he does go on some dates... A tree hugging hippie, has a crack at a cougar, at an underage girl, a girl with no clit, someone who can't stop fanny farting.. Including a road trip -- There are rules that go with it but there's 10 so here's number 9. The Game. When entering a different postcode, the game begins. You know how it works. You get a point for snogging some old fart, five points for flicking the bean, 10 points if she has a chat with the boy, and 15 points for a rumpedy-roo! Just no luck as SOMETHING always happens! There's even a freaking wrestling match! He decided to listen to his co-worker Kelly and take her advice to just be himself. This didn't work so he had Ollie, Rob and Jack help him. I don't want to say too much and give it all away so just read it! ***************************************** My thoughts?! HILARIOUS!- Perfect English humor. Wasn't at all dry or too try hard. It just worked. We were transported into Dan's man mind. Now there was a bit of English slang in there. Ie- Going to take an eyelash. So some people may not get it if you don't know your rhyming slang. A lot of football aka Soccer talk. Wrestling talk. Just man talk. It was crude and I loved it! There was only like 2 typo's I found and they weren't huge so it was fine. Some people have mentioned about how many times Dan went on about not having sex in their reviews.... well to me if he had sex there wouldn't be a book so I was cool with it but it made me LOL, and I loved that every time something happened it was completely different to the last time so weren't stuck on repeat! I hope Steven puts out another book! **************************************** Characters Stacey was a bitch! -Steven knows his shit about women and made us hate her straight away, by doing all the stuff we do that chicks hate! "I can't believe you did this to me," Stacey walled into the phone. "You're such a bastard. You left me on my own on New Years Eve. I fucking hate you.Tonight you heart-raped me!" Rob. the super laid back BFF (sometime so laid back that he was in danger of falling over! Steven's description) Helped Dan with his clothes for his makeover Jack Jack Chatham was definitely the joker of the pack. Jack's role in the makeover was the "man moves" including a hilarious re-enactment of doggy style sex! -- He also uses really lame pick up lines that make you LOL Ollie wasn't the sharpest tool in the box, but at six foot three and 14 stone of muscle he didn't need to be. Even at school the teachers had been nervous to point out his stupidity. Helped Dan with his body for the makeover (also made him watch wrestling!) Kelly - The co-worker. She's hilarious, the office dares? made me giggle sooo much *********************** Fav Quotes: We nicknamed him Jack Cheatham because of the amount of times he strayed from his long-suferring girlfriend Anna. - It wasn't that we condoned his cheating- we had all attempted to intervene on several occasions. But in a man's world it is commonly agreed that if your friend is still capable of looking you in the eye to tell you he knows exactly what he is doing, then that absolves you from all responsibility. Fact. *********************** "Please someone tell me they remember the beast Ollie pulled last night," Jack started up. "I swear to God it was Sloth from the Goonies with long hair!" Ollie grabbed Jack in a headlock, the unlit cigarette hanging from his mouth. "You're just jealous," Ollie replied. "Go on smell my finger!" *********************** "Want to come back to my place for some sex and some pizza?Why not? You don't like pizza?" *********************** "Women are like parking meters; if you don't feed them enough money you face serious consequences. Women are like refrigerators; they're always cold and never seem to have a beer when you need one. Women are like blue jeans; they look good for a while but eventually they fade and have to be replaced. " *********************** "Son," my dad started with his hand on my shoulder. "When you meet a girl, whatever you do don't tell her your real name. That way if you get her pregnant she won't be able to find you." "If you are stupid enough to knock someone up, then I have a little money set aside for an emergency, and we'll fly you to Spain where you can lay low for a couple of years until it blows over." *********************** "It's first date knowledge, Dan," Jack said. "The bloke needs to keep a clear head so he can get the girl drunk enough to convince her that sleeping with him on the first date is a great idea." *********************** I stared at my computer, trying to take in what I just read. It was illiterate, crude, vulgar and completely over the top. It was perhaps the greatest and most inspirational email I had ever received! *********************** The hot girl/ugly combo is no secret in the land of bloke. The good looking girl hangs out with the ugly one to enhance her looks. *********************** Jack - Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Gretchen? Gretchen- Yes, it is actually. Do we know each other? Jack- (pause) I'm going to level with you - I was trying to use a pick-up line and it's backfired. So conclusion - If you enjoy a giggle and English humor. Give it a go!

  9. 5 out of 5

    Steven Scaffardi

    Okay, so I am a little bias seeing as this is my book! But for that reason alone it had to go on my bookshelf! It has been called chick-lit for me (or lad-lit) and already it has received positive feedback (including TV presenters Ortis Deley from Channel 5's The Gadget Show and Choice FM, and Angellica Bell from BBC1's The One Show. You can find more info about the book at my website http://stevenscaffardi.blogspot.co.uk/. Please feel free to drop me a line too. Okay, so I am a little bias seeing as this is my book! But for that reason alone it had to go on my bookshelf! It has been called chick-lit for me (or lad-lit) and already it has received positive feedback (including TV presenters Ortis Deley from Channel 5's The Gadget Show and Choice FM, and Angellica Bell from BBC1's The One Show. You can find more info about the book at my website http://stevenscaffardi.blogspot.co.uk/. Please feel free to drop me a line too.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Anne

    This was a welcome light-hearted read after having read some pretty sinister ones lately. British down to earth humour when it comes to understanding the opposite sex (this applies to both men and women)! When I was just checking out the cover again while pasting it in here, I immediately had to think of the following video clip. If you think this is even remotely funny, you're going to love this book. If not, oh well, tough luck, you should still try this book. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fbt This was a welcome light-hearted read after having read some pretty sinister ones lately. British down to earth humour when it comes to understanding the opposite sex (this applies to both men and women)! When I was just checking out the cover again while pasting it in here, I immediately had to think of the following video clip. If you think this is even remotely funny, you're going to love this book. If not, oh well, tough luck, you should still try this book. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbtI8... So we're basically following Dan and his three-friended posse. Dan's just like the synopsis describes him: a nice guy. With an overdeveloped sense for the dramatic, if you will. “Eight months without sex. People had committed crimes and been given lesser sentences.“ His friends are quite the gems as well: First of all, we’ve got Rob, Dan’s best friend since primary school, who’s the good looking, smart mannered, stylishly clothed, big-hearted guy who gets all the women. I thought I was going to hate his guts for being such a player, but honestly, I can’t help but truly liking him (see the words 'big-hearted' up here), He’s such a great friend to Dan, helping him whenever he can, and treats all his ‘trophies’ with respect, sort of? Don’t get me wrong, he’s still a first class wanker, but…a likable one? *brain freeze* Then there’s Jack, who reminds me a bit of a foul-mouthed leprechaun due to his endless stream of NSFW-remarks together with being of a modest height. Even if he’s a cheating, disrespectful, chlamydia-spreading donkey arse, again, I can’t help but like him? Okay, so what the flying fuck’s going on here Scaffardi?! Is there some brainwashing hypnotic element hidden in the Kindle text version? Should I try the paperback to see if it makes any difference? Erm, yes, and then, last but not least, there’s Ollie. I’ve met quite a few Ollies in real life actually, but can always laugh at the level of stupidity they incorporate. Ollie’s an active member of the local gym but seriously lacks some brain capacity. This makes him a laid back, not too picky kind of guy to be around with and he definitely adds some hilarity to the story with his idiotic comments. If you want to know more about the characters, there’s a detailed ‘Meet the Characters’ section on Steven’s website here. Love it! Ah yes, there’s an author involved here, so I guess I have to say something about the writing style as well eh? Since I forgot there was even an author due to the characters coming alive brilliantly, I think this says enough doesn’t it? Okay, okay, maybe I should just drop a few more notes on the matter. It was great, but sometimes it reminded me a bit more of a movie script instead of a book. I actually wouldn’t be surprised if someone ever decides to turn it into a movie; the visual scenes are already there! Do you think Benedict Cumberbatch might be too old to play Rob? Jack O’Connell would probably make a great Jack if he can drop the Derby accent…but I’m digressing here! I didn’t laugh all throughout the book, but I did giggle out loud a few times which is good enough for me and my [insert resting bitch face]. What I also did was poke my hubby in the shoulder while reading and going “Omg, so this is MAN LOGIC?!“ “I would tell her that anything that happened over six months ago is inadmissible in an argument.“ Something about not calling your mother when you need to tell her something important, and: “She was smart, funny, and easy going. It was a huge bonus that she had big boobs.“ These things have been done/mentioned literally by said hubby several times. I need to read more Lad Lit in the hope of deciphering some more of this odd behaviour… The story in itself was quite predictable most of the time, but I didn’t mind all too much. I’m giving it 4 brownies and can highly recommend it whenever you’re in need of a read to lift your spirits. Don’t shy away from the Lad Lit tag as a woman, it’ll be just as funny and even might be insightful to how unbelievably irrational we can get at times. I recognised myself in Dan’s ex-girlfriend Stacey for a bit and immediately made a note to self to never pull off any of that emotional extortion shit ever again. Or at least until my next cycle comes up. A big thank you to Steven Scaffardi for providing me with a copy of his book in exchange for an honest opinion! Be sure to check out the #LadLitBlogTour as well, in which I will take part myself with a review of the sequel to The Drought: The Flood, and a Character Q&A on the 16th of May!

  11. 5 out of 5

    James

    This book is imbecelic, which in itself is not a problem as the topic is men in their 20s trying to persuade women to sleep with them, which in my personal experience led me to do a toe curlingly stupid things. Also in the interest of full disclosure I had to look up how to spell imbecelic so perhaps not best placed to fling around judgements. The problem with this book is that both the topic and the depiction is imbecelic. I spent most of this book trying to figure out how drunk i would have to This book is imbecelic, which in itself is not a problem as the topic is men in their 20s trying to persuade women to sleep with them, which in my personal experience led me to do a toe curlingly stupid things. Also in the interest of full disclosure I had to look up how to spell imbecelic so perhaps not best placed to fling around judgements. The problem with this book is that both the topic and the depiction is imbecelic. I spent most of this book trying to figure out how drunk i would have to be to find this amusing but not so drunk that I could not read anymore. I settled upon having to consume the following 1. A bottle of red wine (to establish the base) 2. Three pints of scrumpy jack cider (personal revulsion aside it would give you that lack of taste and inhibition) 3. Three shots of flaming sambucas (not only do they make you drunk they are also a handy reference that you have lost all judgement) I think at that stage and for perhaps all of 10 minutes I would be impaired enough to find the book funny before falling into a drunken slumber. Its all a terible shame because in defter hands this all could have been rather funny if not perhaps particulalry illuminating. For actually funny books about haplessley looking for love i recommend "Lucky Jim", for one of the best descriptions of getting drunk and the aftermath "Wilt" is good and if you are simply looking for the obsessiveness angle than of course Portnoys Complaint does a fine job. This book is like the time you showed up sober and everyone else had been drinking themselves silly and then proceeded to tell you all about while invading your personal space while you ran through how much longer this could possibly take. My second challenge with this book is where to leave it. I have had a new rule imposed on me that i am no longer allowed to keep books i dont like due to some mixture of fire hazard, aesthetics and need to move our daughter in a cupboard if things continue the way they are going. I have decided to place it on a night bus where some poor guy going home by himself may find it some comfort.

  12. 5 out of 5

    Phil Altimas

    a very funny book, its one lads struggle to get laid and the trails and tribulations that go with that what made the book for me are his mate and how they all react to each other

  13. 5 out of 5

    Nica

    Prior to this novel, I haven’t heard about the existence of lad-lit. I have read stories which were written by men, but not the counterpart of chic lit. It made me curious as to how something can be classified as such, so after I finished the book I was reading, I didn’t waste time and start checking what the fuss was about. The story started at the end – well, that’s what the chapter said anyway. This was refreshing as most of the novels I have read recently didn’t use this technique. Right away Prior to this novel, I haven’t heard about the existence of lad-lit. I have read stories which were written by men, but not the counterpart of chic lit. It made me curious as to how something can be classified as such, so after I finished the book I was reading, I didn’t waste time and start checking what the fuss was about. The story started at the end – well, that’s what the chapter said anyway. This was refreshing as most of the novels I have read recently didn’t use this technique. Right away, the story unfolded and one can easily guess why the novel was titled like that. The title and theme were introduced in the first chapter, and I actually like it. I have had experiences reading other books which until now I couldn’t decipher why they were titled like that. It was narrated in first person, and it made the connection between the character and the reader (me) stronger. In this kind of story, first person point-of-view is recommended and I am glad the author chose to use that. The main character, Daniel Hilles, was portrayed as a typical English man – or just a man. I felt a bit awkward at first when I have read Dan’s thoughts and actions, but I realized that this is how real men are. Well, mostly. Football and video games, drinking and planning to get laid. There were languages I never imagined I could muster and bold acts I would never wish to see. Still, it’s just my sensitivities. The author wrote the novel in such a way to introduce man’s true thoughts, feelings, and actions that I was appalled to note that if this is how real men are, then I hardly know them at all. Then there were Dan’s friends. The author wasn’t satisfied to tell a story of a single man, but he included his boisterous and crazy friends as well. I wasn’t surprised though. In any chic lit, the star always have her side kicks with her, so why not in a lad-lit? The characters of Dan’s friends were shown as what real men friends are – supportive in almost everything and never lacking of suggestions no matter how absurd they are. The characters were realistic. They weren’t depicted as perfect and flawless personalities and I like that. There were instances were they were characterized negatively, and it made them more believable, like they are just normal people. But what I liked best in the novel was the way Dan was complaining and expressing his heart out about us, women, and our tendencies. It was an eye-opener for me to read this novel. I found myself nodding in almost all of his complaints about our womanly actions. I don’t know how to help him with his problems with women because I also don’t know how we are like that, but I feel for him. I have realized that it is difficult to be a man. I don’t want to give you spoilers, but I would like to share you some of Dan’s thoughts and questions about women: On shopping with a girlfriend: Whose bright idea was it to put the changing rooms bang in the middle of the lingerie department? Groups of men are forced to awkwardly stand around, trying their best not to look like pervs. The problem is, the more you try to look like you are not hanging around sniffing women’s underwear, the more paranoid you become that everyone thinks that is exactly what you are doing. “Which one do you prefer?” Hmm, let me think. I don’t care! Just pick that one, pick any of them! Whichever one you choose will be met by the same response: “Really? I prefer this one.” If you have already made up your mind, don’t ask us. On general: “Why do they always expect you to know what’s wrong with them? If you ask them and they say nothing, and then don’t expect us to press any further on the matter.” “Why do girls insist on chatting continuously when you’re watching the footy, but as soon as the adverts come on they shut up?” “Men are not mind readers. If something is wrong then you should just come out and tell us. It is not fair to presume we don’t care because of out lack of mind-reading abilities… Come out and ask what you want. Subtle hints don’t work. Strong hints don’t work. Obvious hints don’t work. Just say it!” Men, do you agree? Another thing I liked most about this book is the funny way the author narrated Dan’s life. It was utterly hilarious. I was trying hard not to laugh while I read this in a coffee shop while waiting for my friend, and I ended up coughing instead. All in all, the novel was pretty find and I like it. I would have given it five stars if the situations Dan got into were more believable. If I could retitle this, it would be Lemony Snickket’s “A Series of Unfortunate Events”. Dan got into a lot of trouble in ending his drought, and in some points I stopped and asked myself if it was really possible to happen in a single person. That’s the only problem I had with this book and it didn’t affect the way I like it. I would definitely recommend this to everyone, especially to those women who wanted to understand men.

  14. 5 out of 5

    Cindy

    Dan Hilles is just a normal guy with a job, a small group of friends and a long-term girlfriend, but not for long. Things start to change for Dan when he breaks-up with his girlfriend Stacey and he finds himself single again for the first time in three years. Unfortunately for him things don't change in his favour and he enters a period of drought. With some near death experiences, more than a couple of awkward dates and some really embarrassing situations, things are getting real complicated. Bu Dan Hilles is just a normal guy with a job, a small group of friends and a long-term girlfriend, but not for long. Things start to change for Dan when he breaks-up with his girlfriend Stacey and he finds himself single again for the first time in three years. Unfortunately for him things don't change in his favour and he enters a period of drought. With some near death experiences, more than a couple of awkward dates and some really embarrassing situations, things are getting real complicated. But Dan has a goal and he will not stop until he ends the drought. I received a free copy from the author in exchange for an honest review. "We sang it loud. We sang it proud. We sang it with passion. We sang it completely tone deaf. But it didn't matter. It was the perfect end to the evening." Dan has been with Stacey for three years now but she has changed a lot since he met her at university. It all goes wrong at new years even when they get into another fight and Dan decides to spend the night with his friends instead of with her. After the nearly fifty messages she left him that night alone, he decides to put an end to it. But things don't really go as planned and instead of breaking up kind of 'peacefully' he gets kicked out of the house by Stacey best friend Sophie who wants to kill him with a baseball bat. From that point on things change, but not for the better. Time and again Dan gets himself into the must stupid and surreal situations, even his friends are unable to help him break the drought and as it goes on Dan is getting more desperate. Rob, Ollie and Jack try to help him as best as they can but even their knowledge combined can't save Dan from making a complete fool of himself. He even manages to get on the television twice! (not under the best circumstances but heej there is no such thing as bad publicity right?) So yes I did read the sequel first but that doesn't matter because this book is just as awesome, funny and amusing ^_^ Why you ask? Well here is why: This book is everything I hoped it would be. There are the familiar yet unimaginable situations he is able to get into. He does it all on his own and I have to say that is very impressive. I've got more than one favourite scene is this book but I think that this one is the one I loved the most: "'I bumped into Simon Peterson yesterday.' Rob said. 'He lives on Mantilla Road.' 'So what?' I sneered. 'He happened to mention that he saw you on his road on Wednesday night,' Rob announced. 'He was working on his car. He would have said hello, but you sprinted past him at a ferocious pace with a dog chasing you.' 'Was it a poodle?' Ollie questioned. 'No it wasn't a poodle,' I said. 'It was a big horrible, snarling beast.' 'Simon said it was a sausage dog.' Rob said and they all started laughing again. This is a scene where Dan is having a drink with his friends and yes they're making fun of him again. Now what happened before this is quite hilarious because it has to do with a date that would have stopped Dan's drought. Dan got a second chance with Grace and just as they were going to take it one step further, he discovers that he doesn't have any condoms with him. Getting dressed to get some at a store nearby, he runs out of Grace's house but by the time he has to get back he finds out that he has no idea how to get back at all. That is when, after walking some time, he encounters a big horrible snarling beast... that turned out to be a sausage dog. This book was so much fun to read and even though I read the second book first it didn't affect me at all because everything that happened was just as unexpected. The amazing characters combined with the easy use of language, the everyday scenes and hilarious situations made for a great book. Again this book brings the whole dating-scenario from a totally different perspective. Not from the female point of view but from a man's and that makes it all the more fun to read. It is that I am a woman myself but by reading this I understand that most man don't understand women at all, sometimes even I don't understand women (or myself for that matter) at all. Some of the language and scenes might be a little too harsh or descriptive for some people but that just made it better in my opinion. Overall I think the book was great and it was so much fun to read. I would recommend this book to everyone who loves romance/comedy/chicklit kind of novels. I give this book four stars because me really likey.

  15. 5 out of 5

    Shell Baker

    OMG this book is just to funny! I seriously couldn't stop laughing even my kids asked me what I kept laughing at I was actually crying with laughter at one point I don't know how I didn't pee my pants!! LOL. The Drought is the first lad lit that I have read and I'm so glad it was recommended to me by BCB and more. What is Lad Lit I hear you all saying, well its the male version of chick lit. But I have to say The Drought can be read by both especially if you have a dry cheeky sense of humour. Thi OMG this book is just to funny! I seriously couldn't stop laughing even my kids asked me what I kept laughing at I was actually crying with laughter at one point I don't know how I didn't pee my pants!! LOL. The Drought is the first lad lit that I have read and I'm so glad it was recommended to me by BCB and more. What is Lad Lit I hear you all saying, well its the male version of chick lit. But I have to say The Drought can be read by both especially if you have a dry cheeky sense of humour. This says alot about me!! This story is just Fun with a capital F. In it we meet regular kind of guy Dan Hilles having recently broke up with long term girlfriend Stacey Dan finds himself single again having to face a sex Drought. Dan's mates Ollie, Jack and Rob are happy to offer help to get him out of this Drought with disastrous consequences which are just to funny. We meet lots of different female characters in this story each one of them being different. Good job Dan has female friend Kelly to shed some female light on why he's failing so miserably with the opposite sex. This story is a must read for fans of the movies American Pie. Another thing I love about this story is of course how we get inside a man's mind when it comes to being single. This is a must read book for girls and guys it's hilarious you will be laughing from start to end which I cannot recommend enough, giving it 5 massive stars. I would like to thank Steven Scaffardi for a copy of this in exchange for a honest review.

  16. 4 out of 5

    Quentin Stewart

    I received an ARC of this book for an honest review. A very enjoyable read about a young man who has broken up with his steady girlfriend and now is on the search for a new conquest. It seems the harder he tries the longer his "drought" becomes and the more frustration builds up. All of his buddies know the trials he is going through and they are always there with advice and things for him to try. His mother even gets into the act trying to understand what is going on in his life. The book is the I received an ARC of this book for an honest review. A very enjoyable read about a young man who has broken up with his steady girlfriend and now is on the search for a new conquest. It seems the harder he tries the longer his "drought" becomes and the more frustration builds up. All of his buddies know the trials he is going through and they are always there with advice and things for him to try. His mother even gets into the act trying to understand what is going on in his life. The book is the story of the failed attempts that Dan goes through to attempt to break his drought and get someone of the opposite sex in bed. There is one misadventure after another and while he is struggling with the situation it seems all of his friends are doing great in the romance area. Dan has episodes of drunk dancing, political protest march, fighting with his ex's new love interest, and even a road trip that does not go anywhere to solving his problem. A very humorous and enjoyable read. You just cannot guess what is going to happen to Dan next and to what ends he will go to end his "drought". Maybe a rain dance would have worked.

  17. 4 out of 5

    Kerry

    The Drought has been patiently waiting on my kindle for a whole year!! I know!! My apologies, Steven, but better late than never. I'm working my way through my review list slowly, but surely. Anyway, if you haven't already read this book you really should as it is hilarious! Reading it in bed, next to a sleeping husband, trying not to laugh out loud has been quite a challenge! The main character, Dan Hilles, is struggling to get his leg over since splitting up with his long term girlfriend and Th The Drought has been patiently waiting on my kindle for a whole year!! I know!! My apologies, Steven, but better late than never. I'm working my way through my review list slowly, but surely. Anyway, if you haven't already read this book you really should as it is hilarious! Reading it in bed, next to a sleeping husband, trying not to laugh out loud has been quite a challenge! The main character, Dan Hilles, is struggling to get his leg over since splitting up with his long term girlfriend and The Drought follows his story as he counts the hours, days and weeks since the last time he had sex, and his failing attempts with the ladies. His three best friends, Jack, Rob and Ollie are all very different characters, but all likeable in their own way and together they are so funny. The banter between them is brilliant! Ollie cracked me up, Rob is quite the ladies man and Jack, well, I'm not quite sure what to say about Jack! I liked Dan and couldn't help but feel sorry for him as he seems like a genuinely nice bloke. Some of the situations he gets himself into though....... and his Mum's reaction to some of those situations!! LOL! I loved his Mum. This book is comedy genius! I loved it and hope it isn't too long before I get the chance to read the sequel, The Flood.

  18. 4 out of 5

    John Morris

    A laugh out loud type of book! This was a very, very funny story of one man's search for primal gratification. It consisted of full on male humour, deep and meaningful exploits of the bawdy kind, disastrous and painful sexual encounters but, in the end, everything turned out alright for our hero. A laugh out loud type of book! This was a very, very funny story of one man's search for primal gratification. It consisted of full on male humour, deep and meaningful exploits of the bawdy kind, disastrous and painful sexual encounters but, in the end, everything turned out alright for our hero.

  19. 5 out of 5

    kate

    Loved it 100% the best and funniest book I have reads this year. It's funny and romantic. Not a chick flick and not a guy's book, it's so well written and gives a insite to men's mind Loved it 100% the best and funniest book I have reads this year. It's funny and romantic. Not a chick flick and not a guy's book, it's so well written and gives a insite to men's mind

  20. 5 out of 5

    Sassafrass

    This was my first official foray into "Lad-lit". It certainly had it's funny moments. There were also the ones that were just too over the top to do more than roll my eyes. I wasn't expecting the way that things ended but I was thinking like a woman. I may read the follow up book just to find out what happens at some point. I'm not sure if I'll read more in the genre though. This was my first official foray into "Lad-lit". It certainly had it's funny moments. There were also the ones that were just too over the top to do more than roll my eyes. I wasn't expecting the way that things ended but I was thinking like a woman. I may read the follow up book just to find out what happens at some point. I'm not sure if I'll read more in the genre though.

  21. 4 out of 5

    Best Crime Books & More

    Occasionally I receive emails from authors asking if I would be interested in reading their debut novels. Steven was no different and to be honest when I checked out the bio of him I was a little shocked. Yes I had heard of `Lad Lit' but to be honest had never really delved into the world of the Mike Gayle's and the Nick Hornby's. I figured that as I was being offered a chance to read it free, then why not. What I didn't realise was that Lad Lit is the perfect combination of humour and reading f Occasionally I receive emails from authors asking if I would be interested in reading their debut novels. Steven was no different and to be honest when I checked out the bio of him I was a little shocked. Yes I had heard of `Lad Lit' but to be honest had never really delved into the world of the Mike Gayle's and the Nick Hornby's. I figured that as I was being offered a chance to read it free, then why not. What I didn't realise was that Lad Lit is the perfect combination of humour and reading for me and my dry and crude sense of humour! When I read the synopsis I realised that Lad Lit really is just that; Lad lit! The stories regarding love and romance; albeit from a slightly different perspective than that of a woman! As soon as I started reading a few things became apparent. The first was that this author's humour was right up my street. Brash, crude and direct but laugh out loud funny. Dan Hilles is a `typical' bloke. In the beginning of the book we see him break up with his terrifying girlfriend (blimey, she was enough to give all us women a bad reputation). Dan was a likeable bloke though and it didn't take me long to realise that Dan's life was not going to be as easy as he thought. The whole idea of the book is that we see Dan struggle through single life on a `drought' meaning no sex and even less female interaction. I read a review on Amazon which said that the book was repetitive in its nature and that the reader knows that Dan is on a sex drought. Well I have to be honest and say I was confused by that statement. Yes we know he is on a drought, that's what the whole book is about, and believe me it is very funny. Yes, you certainly have to have a certain type of humour, but I cannot imagine one of my friends not liking this book. Obviously if you are somebody who prefers to read books that don't involve swearing or sex, then maybe pass on this one. If not, do yourself a favour and give this book a chance. I was reading this book on the train on my journey home and actually managed to spit my tea out where I was laughing so hard. The man opposite me was not impressed! As the story moves forward we see Dan's attempts at getting some female attention becoming more and more daring, and to be honest more and more of a failure. This book had me cringing, laughing and smiling all the way home. I read it in a day and a half and have already started telling my friends about it. The women will (like I did) laugh at the shocking truths some of which will be close to home, and the men will laugh at the sheer truth of it all. I can tell you now that I didn't know an awful lot about the author until after I had read the book and I checked out his website. I was shocked to realise that he self-published. Maybe, having not read any other `Lad Lit' I cannot compare his book to others in that genre but I honestly think this would be a fantastic author for a publisher to pick up! All I can say Steven, is I seriously hope that even if you don't sign a publishing deal, you continue to self-publish because I will definitely be buying the next one. Overall, an absolutely cracking debut novel and I will be waiting for the next one. HIGHLY recommended!!!

  22. 5 out of 5

    Naznin Azeez

    From the very beginning of reading it, I felt a warm feeling in me because I could positively see that the book was a relaxing one. It set the right mood from the moment it began. I love the way the author gave attention to little details throughout the book. He has definitely thought the whole plot through very very well!. There were certain moments I just laughed out LOUD. He plays around with words in a very hearty manner. You gotta love Steven for not messing with the actual harsh reality of From the very beginning of reading it, I felt a warm feeling in me because I could positively see that the book was a relaxing one. It set the right mood from the moment it began. I love the way the author gave attention to little details throughout the book. He has definitely thought the whole plot through very very well!. There were certain moments I just laughed out LOUD. He plays around with words in a very hearty manner. You gotta love Steven for not messing with the actual harsh reality of life. He portrays Dan as a man who is completely unlucky when it comes to women!. However, some situations that he gets himself into is damn unbelievable while some are plain hilarious. The book is written from a man’s point of view. Women should read this book to see how a man’s mind works!.. Men should read this book so that they can nod along and probably say, “I would have thought so too”.. Hahaha.. Frankly, there were certain times, when I thought the Dan Hilles was completely insensitive!. But there were also times when I sympathized with his complete lack of luck. Certainly getting a look inside a man’s head can be terrifying to a woman. When reading it, inevitably, the question arises in your head whether all guys in your life think the same too. That puts you in a weird position!. It’s hilarious how Steven has described men’s hatred towards shopping. Personally that’s one thing I can never understand about men. But I know for real that not every men are like that. I personally know about two men who actually love shopping. Hahaha. Yeah, two!. Isn’t that awesome?. It’s a nice read. Being only 274 pages, it’s a quick and relaxed read. I kept wondering throughout the book, how it would eventually end. The first chapter was titled The End. Though that chapter made it clear what the book title was about, I could predict most of the stuff like what is going to happen at a date because it was already explained in the first chapter.. That gave away certain suspense as to how things would turn out. Towards the last set of chapters, I kinda started predicting what the end would be. That, kind of made me upset because I couldn’t believe Steven would end it with the obvious. However, he introduced a nice twist towards the end which was totally unexpected and threw my doubts about his ability to keep it entertaining, right out the window. You gotta read the book to know what it’s all about The chat up/pick up lines used by Dan’s friends are absolutely brilliant. They all made me laugh. I kinda had a feeling that if a guy said that to me in real life I might actually laugh and would definitely get talking with him!. All in all, I give the book 4/5 which by Goodreads standards mean that I ‘really liked’ it.

  23. 4 out of 5

    Andrew To

    Really enjoyed this one.... 5 stars without question. The humour in this book is just so good it got me laughing all the way through - every moment in the book i would have burst out laughing or put a hand over my face hoping the character does not do what i think he is about to do... absolutely hilarious and embarrassing. My only disappointment with this was wanting more towards the end and seeing the book come to an end. But i hear there is going to be a sequel so really cant wait for that ! A Really enjoyed this one.... 5 stars without question. The humour in this book is just so good it got me laughing all the way through - every moment in the book i would have burst out laughing or put a hand over my face hoping the character does not do what i think he is about to do... absolutely hilarious and embarrassing. My only disappointment with this was wanting more towards the end and seeing the book come to an end. But i hear there is going to be a sequel so really cant wait for that ! A simple plot about one guy breaking up with his girlfriend and decides to start counting down the days till he has sex again, hence the title 'The Drought'. Sounds simple enough, welcome to ever guys nightmare in the world of desperation and lousy romances and doing/saying things at the wrong moment - this is definitely a lad lit book, see what goes through the mind of a guy, how a guy responds, what sort of advice he gets from his friends... and best of all also written by a guy...lol. Sometimes when reading through the book it really did get me questioning what i would do in those situations. Pace of the book was just brilliant. The chapters were not too long, but not too short, so it allowed me to break the reading during my train journeys, before bed and during lunchtime coffee breaks. Only problem with that is trying to hold in laughs and making an absolute fool of yourself when reading this in public faces. I remember sitting there on the train with my headphones on reading through the book and not realising how much i had creased up during that time and burst out laughing. I only found out when the person sitting opposite me got up and instead of getting off the train sat a couple of seats away from me. So humiliating.. thanks author... lol. What i also loved is the book is being written in a first person context, and throws in plenty of conversation that kept me engaged. I just love it when the characters engage as you will always expect something silly to be said and it turning into a very humorous event. A very nice mix of the two throughout the entire book. Its a definitely recommendation from me. The book is very funny, will keep you entertained throughout - would advise to read in non-public places. Bring on the sequel... it cant come soon enough... this book has totally spoiled the next books i read and will find it very hard to compare anything close to it. 5/5

  24. 4 out of 5

    Maureen Reil

    This is Lad-Lit at its finest and I loved it from start to finish and you can’t say that about many books. I enjoyed it so much that I recommended it to the hubby, who informed me that it was bound to be wittier than chick-lit because men are naturally funnier than women and that’s why there are no decent, British female stand-up comedians. Hence the debate that followed about him challenging me to name any famous ones, apart from Jo Brand, which was on the tip of my tongue. So I expressed a lik This is Lad-Lit at its finest and I loved it from start to finish and you can’t say that about many books. I enjoyed it so much that I recommended it to the hubby, who informed me that it was bound to be wittier than chick-lit because men are naturally funnier than women and that’s why there are no decent, British female stand-up comedians. Hence the debate that followed about him challenging me to name any famous ones, apart from Jo Brand, which was on the tip of my tongue. So I expressed a liking for that one that makes jokes about her weight and her man issues and cakes and he told me not to mention Jo Brand but I wasn't, I was talking about the one from Newcastle only I couldn't remember her name. Point won, he replied. And that brings me back to why I adored this book since it’s full of advice for the ladies as to what goes on inside a man’s mind, which isn't a lot if you take away the football, the beer and the sex but apart from that they are basic creatures that we just can’t live without, without falling for their manly charms, especially when they use them on us. This novel follows the premise for the best in the genre and that is to keep the story simple and easy to relate to and keep the laughs coming, when the main character gets into all sorts of cringe-worthy situations and you wonder what the hell is coming next for the poor guy so you can't stop turning the pages to find out. And when the author gets it right, you’ll know it when you read it and want to tell the world that you've found a brilliant new comedy writer who goes by the name of Steven Scaffardi. The Drought is about a typical bloke called Dan who has a group of pals that always have his back and their banter is so true to life that I swear I’m related to one of them as they try their best to steer Dan in the right direction after his breakup with his long-standing girlfriend, which in turn leads to ‘the drought’ being his hilarious plight to end his sexless life from there on in. Will Dan ever get laid again? Will Dan manage to keep his job and his love life separate? And will Dan take his mother’s advice instead of his friends? You’ll have to get your hands on a copy to find out so don’t delay on bringing some wicked, humour filled literature into you day by reading this book too.

  25. 4 out of 5

    Robert Day

    Gah! Goodreads ate my review! I had previously posted this brilliant review that took me bloomin' ages to write because I'd really thought it out, and it had references to Jazz and 3D Stereoscopic Pictures that I'd Googled Google especially to find and when I came to look at it today, it'd gone - vanished into the blue, which is how I feel right now; having to write another one! ..and there was me feeling all antsy because the author had been putting 'Like' next to all the other reviews, but had n Gah! Goodreads ate my review! I had previously posted this brilliant review that took me bloomin' ages to write because I'd really thought it out, and it had references to Jazz and 3D Stereoscopic Pictures that I'd Googled Google especially to find and when I came to look at it today, it'd gone - vanished into the blue, which is how I feel right now; having to write another one! ..and there was me feeling all antsy because the author had been putting 'Like' next to all the other reviews, but had not liked my beautifully crafted effort. Now I know why! Anyway, you're probably wondering what all this has to do with reviewing a book... well, sod all really, but I'm experimenting with using my 'authentic voice' so this is what you've got. Bear with me on this because I'm going to start out by saying that I couldn't stand the book at first because I had this hang up about free books being amateurish and that meant that I read the first chapter really slowly and carefully looking for the slightest mistake or awkwardness in the writing style; and suprise, surprise, I seemed to find loads and loads of mistakes and awkwardness. Then I settled myself down and started to read properly, which to me means fast enough to let the story emerge from the words.. and everything clicked into place. The characters are large and lovable and the story is just about almost believable if I think back to when I was a lad and sex was the only thing on my mind from morning to night (and beyond). I did find there to be more 'gayness' in the story than I remember being in my thoughts in them days; but perhaps the world has grown up since then. I read this book over about four days and for those days I was either reading this book, or wanting to read this book. The story hooked me so much that I variously read it during lunch (at work), while shopping in M&S, whilst in a traffic jam, and while sitting on the.. but pehaps we don't need to go there. I read somewhere that the author is writing a follow-up (The One that Got Away?) - well sign me up for that - I can't wait!

  26. 4 out of 5

    Sophie (Blogger)

    The first thing I can say is that The Drought made me laugh, not your normal laugh but a side splitting laugh that still make you laugh even now. The second thing is that everyone should read it...now! The story follows Dan Hilles who after breaking up with his girlfriend is having a bit of a sex drought, no matter what he tries seems to end with him getting beaten up or a laughing stock from his friends. The story is told through entries from different days that are before and after his break up The first thing I can say is that The Drought made me laugh, not your normal laugh but a side splitting laugh that still make you laugh even now. The second thing is that everyone should read it...now! The story follows Dan Hilles who after breaking up with his girlfriend is having a bit of a sex drought, no matter what he tries seems to end with him getting beaten up or a laughing stock from his friends. The story is told through entries from different days that are before and after his break up from his girlfriend and involve the main parts of his drought. While Dan isn't so happy about being single again mainly due to the no sex issue, his best friends are thrilled their friend is single and are willing to help him get back on the dating scene again...if only it was that easy. Throughout the book you met a lot of different characters including Kelly who is Dan's co-worker and his information source for finding out what women want and how he can get one to take notice of him. I loved the friendship between Dan and Kelly, even with his dating issues and work problems he knows he can count on her to give him the facts straight. Which is the totally opposite to the advice his friends give him. There are a number of funny pick-up lines in the book which are mainly told from his friends that let you know that they are just as bad as Dan when it comes to dating and that maybe they should all take Kelly's advice and just be straight with women instead of trying to be something they are not. The Drought is a funny novel that has everything you want in a book, with it's dating disasters, friends who don't care if you are the butt of their advice and the situations that Dan gets himself in trying to get himself out of his drought. If you like reading about men doing funny things and getting themselves into situations that you could totally imagine happening in real life then this book is for you! If I had to sum this book up in three words, they would be Humorous, Memorable and Legendary.

  27. 5 out of 5

    Kell

    WARNING – This book will make you cry… with laughter! I’m a big fan of lad-lit (I read a hell of a lot more of it than I do chick-lit, and I’m a chick!), and Scaffardi has packed everything you could possibly want into this voyage of self- and sexual discovery. Dan is a tragically comic character – let’s face it, we all know a guy who isn’t so successful with the ladies and tries just a little too hard with hilarious outcomes – and his mates are just as daft. All are present and correct – the smo WARNING – This book will make you cry… with laughter! I’m a big fan of lad-lit (I read a hell of a lot more of it than I do chick-lit, and I’m a chick!), and Scaffardi has packed everything you could possibly want into this voyage of self- and sexual discovery. Dan is a tragically comic character – let’s face it, we all know a guy who isn’t so successful with the ladies and tries just a little too hard with hilarious outcomes – and his mates are just as daft. All are present and correct – the smooth cheater who thinks he can bag any woman he fancies (and usually does), the big bruiser who is a bit soft in the head, but his heart is in the right place (and he’s there to pick up the leftovers from the others – all those not-so-pretty friends who are left over when the smoothie has had his pick), and the brains of the outfit who isn’t always quite as sharp as he’d like to think, but usually comes good. And then there are the women. You know the types – all those scary first dates that ever went wrong and made you the joke of the week with your buddies, all the bunny boilers in the making and clinging vines and whining jealous types, march in and out of poor Dan’s love life without him getting even a sniff of a chance of getting them into bed. The plot follows a tried and tested path, and you always know where Dan is going to end up come the end of the book, but the journey to get to that point is so funny you don’t care that you know what’s going to happen because you genuinely want it to happen that way. This has a broad appeal and would be the perfect gift for the lad in your life, or even the chick with a knowing sense of humour who will recognise her man-mates on the pages, and there are sex gags and innuendos galore which will have you giggling from start to finish, while you cheer Dan and his mates along the way.

  28. 5 out of 5

    Tabitha R

    This book is frickin hilarious! I have to admit I was a bit apprehensive when I first had the request to read/ review this book. It just didn't seem like it was my kind of reading. A book based on a man and his four buddies trying to get him laid just wasn't my kind of book. Boy am I glad I was wrong. So.. With uncertainty I began the book. And I was instantly hooked. Dan, Ollie, Jack & Rob were just a perfect fit together. Each adding their own personality spice to the mix that made you look forw This book is frickin hilarious! I have to admit I was a bit apprehensive when I first had the request to read/ review this book. It just didn't seem like it was my kind of reading. A book based on a man and his four buddies trying to get him laid just wasn't my kind of book. Boy am I glad I was wrong. So.. With uncertainty I began the book. And I was instantly hooked. Dan, Ollie, Jack & Rob were just a perfect fit together. Each adding their own personality spice to the mix that made you look forward to each and every encounter they had with each other. Ollie the oversized dumb jock, Rob the sweet charmer, and Jack the over the top everyone wants him guys. They helped make this story from the start. Dan, (main character of this story) the poor guy just broken up with his longtime college girlfriend found himself at a loss when it came to him getting back in the dating game. Eccentrically, his only concern was to get over his drought of not having sex. And that's when the fun begins. I originally thought by the synopsis of the book that it was because of his childhood friend that got him in various predicaments. Although they did contribute a lot to his embarrassing moments. Dan in himself was a clumsy awkward and OMG embarrassing man. The situations he got himself into we're priceless. I don't want to get into details since I think it will take some of the hilarity out of this book but... The moment he went out on his 1st date with Grace and he was dancing. I laughed so hard my daughters came downstairs to find out what was wrong with me!! Or when Jack was taking his turn to help "makeover" Dan! I had to get a tissue because I was laughing so hard my eyes were watering. And there was so much more inbetween! I definitely recommend this book to any reader. And look forward to more reads by this author!

  29. 4 out of 5

    ManOfLaBook.com

    The Drought by Steven Sca­fardi is a novel which fol­lows an unfor­tu­nate man try­ing to get laid. The title refers to the period the pro­tag­o­nist goes through between hav­ing sex. The book is being mar­keted as a genre called "lad lit" which, to me, seems appropriate. Dan Hilles broke up with Stacey, his long time girl­friend. Dan has been out of the dat­ing game for so long he has no idea on how to pro­ceed, talk to girls or even behave as a sin­gle man. But Dan has his friends, Ollie, Jack a The Drought by Steven Sca­fardi is a novel which fol­lows an unfor­tu­nate man try­ing to get laid. The title refers to the period the pro­tag­o­nist goes through between hav­ing sex. The book is being mar­keted as a genre called "lad lit" which, to me, seems appropriate. Dan Hilles broke up with Stacey, his long time girl­friend. Dan has been out of the dat­ing game for so long he has no idea on how to pro­ceed, talk to girls or even behave as a sin­gle man. But Dan has his friends, Ollie, Jack and Rob who are there to help and also trip him for their own amuse­ment. After all, what are friends for? The Drought by Steven Sca­fardi is a funny book which takes place in Eng­land. The nar­ra­tive flows smoothly and, while the sit­u­a­tions are some­what pre­dictable, they are still funny and clever. I really enjoyed the humor in this book, it was some­times raunchy, but mostly sar­cas­tic and worked as the guys kept on bust­ing one another. There is a bunch of Eng­lish slang in the book, which was fine and helped the nar­ra­tive feel authen­tic. There were sports ref­er­ences galore and lude, crude men talk. While this book is funny, it is also a bit sad and cyn­i­cal because…hold on to your hats… it mostly rings true. Granted, we don’t all get into a humil­i­at­ing sit­u­a­tion every date, guys do stu­pid things in order to impress women (it’s in our genes) and we con­stantly think about sex (mostly dur­ing a “drought”). And no, we didn’t learn a damn thing in the process. But don’t worry Dan, as every­one knows after a Drought… there is a flood. Dis­claimer: I got this book for free For more reviews and bookish posts please visit http://www.ManOfLaBook.com

  30. 5 out of 5

    Teena in Toronto

    When the book starts, it's September 13 and Dan has just gotten tossed out of a bar, where he was drowning his sorrows, by a female bartender. Then Dan takes us back nine months earlier, to January 1, to fill us in on how he ended up in this predicament. He and his girlfriend of three years, Stacey, had just broken up. They had grown apart since they graduated from university last year ... she'd gotten nasty and clingy. It's been a while since he's been single and his friends, Rob (the funny one) When the book starts, it's September 13 and Dan has just gotten tossed out of a bar, where he was drowning his sorrows, by a female bartender. Then Dan takes us back nine months earlier, to January 1, to fill us in on how he ended up in this predicament. He and his girlfriend of three years, Stacey, had just broken up. They had grown apart since they graduated from university last year ... she'd gotten nasty and clingy. It's been a while since he's been single and his friends, Rob (the funny one), Jack (the cheating one) and Ollie (the big slow one), are more than happy to give him advice and get him back out there. As the months go by, Dan isn't looking for a girlfriend, he just wants some action and this becomes their mission. We go on many dates with Dan, all ending in various kinds of disasters. Poor Dan! Dan has a sales job and he suspects his boss ("please call me Dick") has a crush on him. What gets Dan through the day plus giving him a woman's perspective is the platonic friendship he has with his colleague, Kelly. I really enjoyed this book and liked the humorous writing style. It is hilarious! This is lad-lit (chick-lit for men) so it was interesting reading about a break-up from a male perspective. The story is based in the London area and the author is English. As such, there are phrases and expressions that are specific to being English and some I wasn't familiar with (but it wasn't hard to figure it out). The language and actions are for a mature reader. I hope Steven writes many more books like this because I'll be reading them! Blog review post: http://www.teenaintoronto.com/2012/11...

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