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What Matters Most: The Get Your Shit Together Guide to Wills, Money, Insurance, and Life’s “What-ifs”

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A practical look at putting your life together written by the founder of the internationally celebrated website Get Your Shit Together and informed by the author’s personal experience after her husband was killed in a biking accident. Part memoir, part hard-working how-to guidebook, What Matters Most inspires readers to get their ‘affairs in order’ before the unthinkable ( A practical look at putting your life together written by the founder of the internationally celebrated website Get Your Shit Together and informed by the author’s personal experience after her husband was killed in a biking accident. Part memoir, part hard-working how-to guidebook, What Matters Most inspires readers to get their ‘affairs in order’ before the unthinkable (or inevitable) happens. On July 17, 2009, Chanel Reynolds’s husband, José, was sideswiped by a van while cycling near their home in Seattle. In the aftermath of her husband’s sudden death, Reynolds quickly realized that she was left bewildered and underprepared for what happens next. What was the password to his phone? Did they sign their wills? How much insurance did they have? Could she afford the house? And what the hell was probate court anyway? Simply put, when life went sideways she didn’t have her shit together. As it turns out, most of us don’t either. We’re too busy, in denial, overwhelmed, don’t know where to start. We procrastinate or outright avoid having these difficult yet critical conversations. Reynolds learned the hard way that hoping for the best is not a plan, but you don’t have to. Drawing on her first-hand experience, expert advice, and the unparalleled resources she’s compiled from her popular website and checklists, Reynolds lends her, friendly, human voice to help readers navigate and avoid much of confusion, overwhelm, and uncertainty when ‘something happens’ and learn how to: • Create a will, living will, and power of attorney documents • Update (or finally get) the right life insurance policy • Start or grow an emergency fund and prioritize your spending • Make a watertight emergency and ‘What-If’ plan • Keep secure, up-to-date records of personal information Authoritative yet intimate, grounded but irreverent, Reynolds’s voice carries readers through a tough subject with candor and compassion. Weaving personal story with hard-won wisdom, What Matters Most is the approachable, no-nonsense handbook we all need to living a life free of worry and “what ifs.”


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A practical look at putting your life together written by the founder of the internationally celebrated website Get Your Shit Together and informed by the author’s personal experience after her husband was killed in a biking accident. Part memoir, part hard-working how-to guidebook, What Matters Most inspires readers to get their ‘affairs in order’ before the unthinkable ( A practical look at putting your life together written by the founder of the internationally celebrated website Get Your Shit Together and informed by the author’s personal experience after her husband was killed in a biking accident. Part memoir, part hard-working how-to guidebook, What Matters Most inspires readers to get their ‘affairs in order’ before the unthinkable (or inevitable) happens. On July 17, 2009, Chanel Reynolds’s husband, José, was sideswiped by a van while cycling near their home in Seattle. In the aftermath of her husband’s sudden death, Reynolds quickly realized that she was left bewildered and underprepared for what happens next. What was the password to his phone? Did they sign their wills? How much insurance did they have? Could she afford the house? And what the hell was probate court anyway? Simply put, when life went sideways she didn’t have her shit together. As it turns out, most of us don’t either. We’re too busy, in denial, overwhelmed, don’t know where to start. We procrastinate or outright avoid having these difficult yet critical conversations. Reynolds learned the hard way that hoping for the best is not a plan, but you don’t have to. Drawing on her first-hand experience, expert advice, and the unparalleled resources she’s compiled from her popular website and checklists, Reynolds lends her, friendly, human voice to help readers navigate and avoid much of confusion, overwhelm, and uncertainty when ‘something happens’ and learn how to: • Create a will, living will, and power of attorney documents • Update (or finally get) the right life insurance policy • Start or grow an emergency fund and prioritize your spending • Make a watertight emergency and ‘What-If’ plan • Keep secure, up-to-date records of personal information Authoritative yet intimate, grounded but irreverent, Reynolds’s voice carries readers through a tough subject with candor and compassion. Weaving personal story with hard-won wisdom, What Matters Most is the approachable, no-nonsense handbook we all need to living a life free of worry and “what ifs.”

30 review for What Matters Most: The Get Your Shit Together Guide to Wills, Money, Insurance, and Life’s “What-ifs”

  1. 5 out of 5

    Brittani Lenz

    You're gonna cry

  2. 4 out of 5

    Rachelle

    What Matters Most... an introductory guide to understanding, creating, and protecting documents and procedures needed for end of life/ financial planning. Approximately 25% of the book contains solid information regarding how to set up, what to include, and what types of documents are needed to properly disperse personal wealth to heirs or trusts. The remaining book was a memoir/ autobiography about the author's misfortune in losing her husband too soon.

  3. 5 out of 5

    Mary

    Good book that makes a compelling case for taking care of legal matters for every individual. I only take issue with the veracity with which she advocated for a living will. A health care power of attorney that designates a person to advocate for another individual is far more powerful. The book is so readable and the story is heart breaking.

  4. 5 out of 5

    C

    LOVED LOVED LOVED this quick, easy, funny read. (much better than her other two books) I laughed out loud and changed my perspective on quite a few things : ) Thanks Chanel !

  5. 5 out of 5

    Barrie

    I was in tears almost every 50 pages of the first half of this book. But then I couldn't finish the 2nd half bc of vacations and had to listen to the rest on audiobook. It definitely had a different vibe. So much so that I would highly rec you NOT listen to this book. Only read it. I may actually reread it soon just so I can finish it the way I wanted to, bc the audio version really didn't do it for me. The VO's tone was so matter of fact and not a hint of remorse or sadness or anything. Chanel' I was in tears almost every 50 pages of the first half of this book. But then I couldn't finish the 2nd half bc of vacations and had to listen to the rest on audiobook. It definitely had a different vibe. So much so that I would highly rec you NOT listen to this book. Only read it. I may actually reread it soon just so I can finish it the way I wanted to, bc the audio version really didn't do it for me. The VO's tone was so matter of fact and not a hint of remorse or sadness or anything. Chanel's experience is so emotional and raw, even with so many years past it I got the sense that she is still very much in it every single day. As I can only imagine anyone dealing with such a traumatic blow would be. This is a smart woman who lived just like most of us--unprepared. I have followed her for years now and it's the reason why I'm currently printing out my upteenth ICE papers for my husband and mom to review. I'm sure there's a simplier way, but right now just having all our info in Google docs is my way of keeping my shit together. I'm always amazed that there are parents who don't have wills, don't have life insurance, or so many other things--but then I also understand that sometimes life just sneaks up on you and you always plan to do something sometime...and then bing, bang, boom sometimes hits you right in the face. To anyone reading this who hasn't gotten their shit together, please stop what you're doing right now and get this book or check out her site. It's so important. Not just for your sanity and well-being, but for your whole family (whether you have kids or not). Edit: Finally reading the end bc I didn't like how the audio version treated this well-written book. I'm glad I am...it's already exactly how I remembered, while being helpful to my personal future of getting shit together. Finished the 2nd time around and yeah, don't do the audiobook. It's not nearly as impactful. I almost shed a tear reading the acknowledgements! Her words are better read in your head than out loud by someone who is not her. Also, if I haven't said this enough...GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER! Think your spouse can't get hit by a car? Does anyone in your family ride a bike in a city? Do you know anyone who hasn't experienced death? Come on, people! Get your wills already. Get your finances in order already. Get your passwords to your phone in a doc already. It'll take you a month from your life, a little here and a little there. Make a date out of it and go to a coffee shop with your loved one and talk about death...romantic, I know--but vital. Do you want the added stress of not knowing if your spouse has life insurance if/when s/he dies? The only stress you'll be able to handle is the stress of dealing with the death--anything more is way too much to deal with. Don't be silly. Turn off the Netflix and just get this important life stuff done. Please. Please!

  6. 4 out of 5

    Christie

    With every nerve ending splayed open and raw, Chanel Reynolds takes readers through the life altering tragedy of losing her husband José to a bicycle-auto accident. Reynold unabashedly shares every painful emotion, decision, and event through José's horrific week-long yet unsuccessful struggle to survive and the next four years of her own recovery. In alternating sections, Reynolds splices excellent self-help advice with aching grief narrative. Her no-bullshit advice - that we can all use - abou With every nerve ending splayed open and raw, Chanel Reynolds takes readers through the life altering tragedy of losing her husband José to a bicycle-auto accident. Reynold unabashedly shares every painful emotion, decision, and event through José's horrific week-long yet unsuccessful struggle to survive and the next four years of her own recovery. In alternating sections, Reynolds splices excellent self-help advice with aching grief narrative. Her no-bullshit advice - that we can all use - about death and dying and the preparation thereof, is sound and solid, contrasting poignantly with her roller coaster recovery from the tragedy of losing the husband she loved, father to their five-year-old son Gabi. The advice is not just for those struck by tragic loss of a spouse, but significant information we should all act on now.

  7. 4 out of 5

    Kristy

    You may not believe me, but I actually bought this book about a year and a half ago and now, when I really do need to get my shit together, it floated up to the top of my "to read" pile! I started following Chanel Reynolds' website and got on her email list about six years ago and was inspired to take some very baby steps at bringing together my personal / account information for Josh and downloading some fill-in-the-blank Texas will forms from the library. After a few years of not ever starting You may not believe me, but I actually bought this book about a year and a half ago and now, when I really do need to get my shit together, it floated up to the top of my "to read" pile! I started following Chanel Reynolds' website and got on her email list about six years ago and was inspired to take some very baby steps at bringing together my personal / account information for Josh and downloading some fill-in-the-blank Texas will forms from the library. After a few years of not ever starting those will forms, we ended up paying a very nice lawyer to help us draft up our wills, advanced care directives, and medical power of attorney documents and OH MY GOD I'm so glad we did. Having to think about my will and advanced care directives while facing a stage IV cancer diagnosis would have been a much different thing than taking care of these when nothing more dire than just regular life was staring us down. About the time we were getting our wills together, Reynolds announced that a book version of her story and shit-getting-together-advice was going to be published. I pre-ordered a copy right away. In 2009 Reynolds got a call that her husband was in a bike accident and was hurt badly. He never came out of his coma, and she had to make the decision to take him off life support a week later and was left to take care of their young son with a huge mortgage, no savings, and a will that they had drawn up but never had signed or notarized. Over the coming years she retrospectively got shit together and then made a plan for the future, and then made her website to share the checklists and resources she gathered along the way. This book has those checklists and resources covering legal documents, financial issues, insurance, grief, what the heck to do logistically when someone you love dies, and other important topics, but it is also, movingly, a deeply personal memoir of her experience with her husband's death and the aftermath. Reynolds is an engaging and funny reader who doesn't pull punches with her grief, her mis-steps, and her lack of cut and dry answers. I may have a diagnosis that is making me think of these things more strongly than others, but EVERYONE should take some steps to get their affairs in order and make plans for the big "what if's" in life. This book is a great place to start, as is the website (https://getyourshittogether.org/ -- especially the checklist and recommends sections) [Finally: No matter what, you should absolutely get a will drawn up -- especially if you have kids, aren't married to your partner, or have special wishes or needs, but, honestly, even if you are a single person without much stuff. Download those forms from the library and actually fill them out (or pay a lawyer some money to get yourself to actually do it like I did). We can all go at any time and this is a not-that-hard thing you can do to make it a little easier for your friends and family.]

  8. 4 out of 5

    Amy

    I really thought I would just "browse" through this, but I ended up zipping through this and taking photos of many of the pages, for future reference. I already have the usual stuff - will, living wills, insurance, info. about my bank accounts, etc, but as I learned from this book, there are other things to consider, as well. Does someone in your family or a close friend know your username & password(s) for things such as your laptop, tablet, smartphone? What about email? Social Media apps? Onli I really thought I would just "browse" through this, but I ended up zipping through this and taking photos of many of the pages, for future reference. I already have the usual stuff - will, living wills, insurance, info. about my bank accounts, etc, but as I learned from this book, there are other things to consider, as well. Does someone in your family or a close friend know your username & password(s) for things such as your laptop, tablet, smartphone? What about email? Social Media apps? Online memberships? Have you told your "person" how to contact your doctors? lawyers? insurance agent? credit card companies? Think about every single thing that you have that requires a contact or a username & password - It's mind boggling! Besides the items I listed above, think about your digital access - TV, movies, magazines, music, books ... Do you game? What about online auctions / shopping? Are you a member of a coupon club? Airline / Hotel Rewards? Digital Dollars? Do you do anything with password management? These things can be your "little" secret, for now, but eventually, someone needs to know all of this information, so you don't continue to be charged for x account or they can shut down your social media account, if this is your desire. Wow!

  9. 4 out of 5

    Bonnie

    I first read Chanel Reynold's story a few years ago. She discovered that she didn't "have her shit together" at all when her husband was killed in a bike accident, leaving her with their 5 year old son without will, in too big a house, not knowing what sort of insurance she had. As she manouvered her grief and the paperwork, it occurred to her that her research could help others get the shit together before Death, Diagnosis Disability or other Disaster caught them, so she started a website (gety I first read Chanel Reynold's story a few years ago. She discovered that she didn't "have her shit together" at all when her husband was killed in a bike accident, leaving her with their 5 year old son without will, in too big a house, not knowing what sort of insurance she had. As she manouvered her grief and the paperwork, it occurred to her that her research could help others get the shit together before Death, Diagnosis Disability or other Disaster caught them, so she started a website (getyourshittogether.org) offering all her checklists and new-found wisdom—which I duly downloaded, and ignored. When I saw she'd put it all in a book, I got it—and now we've found a lawyer who will help us with the paperwork, and we're seriously talking about, "If you should go first..." I really recommend getting the book and using it. BTW, she's now teamed up with someone else who has a similar website, which doesn't just have checklists but very helpful online forms, including emergency calls. Get the book and start working with the website, ASAP, not sometime next year, or when you're 'older'. No excuses. You will make life much easier for whoever needs to pick it all up.

  10. 5 out of 5

    Shay

    Disclaimer: I received a free review copy of this title from the publisher. The larger part of What Matters Most consists of Reynolds’ memoir about her husband’s accident, the decision to remove medical support, and the fall-out from his death. She is brutally honest about the mistakes they unwittingly made in the nine years of their marriage leading up to it, as well as her struggles in the days, weeks, and even years that followed. Grief is a strange country, but Reynolds takes us there vividly Disclaimer: I received a free review copy of this title from the publisher. The larger part of What Matters Most consists of Reynolds’ memoir about her husband’s accident, the decision to remove medical support, and the fall-out from his death. She is brutally honest about the mistakes they unwittingly made in the nine years of their marriage leading up to it, as well as her struggles in the days, weeks, and even years that followed. Grief is a strange country, but Reynolds takes us there vividly, through all the wild ups and downs, and unexpected turns of such a loss. This account also follows her into single motherhood, and through picking up the pieces of her life, and having to imagine an entirely new future for herself and their son. Her style is forthright, and occasionally irreverent, but still very affecting; she had me in tears more than once. The memoir portion stands well on its own and is worth reading quite apart from the advice Reynolds also provides. more

  11. 5 out of 5

    Katie Lynn

    Create a cell list of emergency contacts in your favorites Fill in your phone's "in case of emergency" (ICE)info/default emergency settings ICE plan with family "We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don't really get solved. They come together and they fall apart." --Pema Chodron "The beneficiary beats the will." "How alive can I be? How much better can I get? What is most important to me? What is unacceptable? How do I describe being able to Create a cell list of emergency contacts in your favorites Fill in your phone's "in case of emergency" (ICE)info/default emergency settings ICE plan with family "We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don't really get solved. They come together and they fall apart." --Pema Chodron "The beneficiary beats the will." "How alive can I be? How much better can I get? What is most important to me? What is unacceptable? How do I describe being able to meaningfully engage in the world? How do I define my quality of life now? What does home look like now?" "Did I want to sell the house? Yes. Did I have some apprehension that I might regret it in the future? Yes. Should I let doubt and possible future regret stop me from moving forward the best way I know how, with the information I have right now? No! God, no." chanelreynolds.com

  12. 5 out of 5

    Carla (happiestwhenreading)

    #partner @harperwave @tlcbooktours When Reynold's husband was tragically killed in a bicycle accident, she quickly realized that they didn't have their sh*t together (regarding wills, medical decisions, and estate planning)! From that experience, Reynolds set up a website and wrote this book to help people have the tough conversations in order to be as prepared as possible should tragedy also strike their families. While I enjoyed this book very much, it didn't have as much as the logistical infor #partner @harperwave @tlcbooktours When Reynold's husband was tragically killed in a bicycle accident, she quickly realized that they didn't have their sh*t together (regarding wills, medical decisions, and estate planning)! From that experience, Reynolds set up a website and wrote this book to help people have the tough conversations in order to be as prepared as possible should tragedy also strike their families. While I enjoyed this book very much, it didn't have as much as the logistical information I was hoping for. My husband and I are in the midst of updating our wills so I was hoping to get better information for that process. This read more like a memoir to me...so in that respect, it was very good. As a guide to getting your sh*t together though, it fell short for me.

  13. 5 out of 5

    K2 -----

    Although I found some of the use of profanity to be ineffective and diminish the author's writing this is a powerful book for those who need a swift kick to get going on their financial/estate planning. In a family or couple, one is going to die before another in all likelihood. Families with children do not have the time to contemplate many of the things she discusses in her book but her story will convince you to make the time and put it in line above other things on your list. The author come Although I found some of the use of profanity to be ineffective and diminish the author's writing this is a powerful book for those who need a swift kick to get going on their financial/estate planning. In a family or couple, one is going to die before another in all likelihood. Families with children do not have the time to contemplate many of the things she discusses in her book but her story will convince you to make the time and put it in line above other things on your list. The author comes from a privileged background and it was a jolt for her to lose her husband in a bike accident and to be suddenly thrust into the role of single mother. She was fortunate to have means and friends who were willing to show up and help her in this rough time but the emotions and stress come in any socioeconomic strata. Much of this book is her story that illustrates the emotions and frustrations one can feel if they are not prepared for what may come next or how these end-of-life things are handled. Our culture is divorced from end of life and is not serving us well. We expect miracles from medicine and doctors who feel they are failures if they can't save a life, no matter what the quality of life may be afterwards. Reynolds takes her readers through her experiences and details things many will not have thought about. I felt the book could have been better edited and polished in places but such is the nature of the publishing business these days. This is an important book that many people with young chidlren who don't have the time should read and act upon. A long wait list at the library should tell you how important a topic this book tackles.

  14. 4 out of 5

    Debra

    Chanel Reynolds' story might be both the most difficult and the most important book you ever read. With unflinching honesty and raw emotion, she details what happens after her husband is fatally injured in a bicycle accident. She finds they hadn't adequately planned for a worst case scenario and that made the aftermath more complicated then it should have been. Since his death, she's made it her mission to help others be better prepared. The book includes checklists and vital information about t Chanel Reynolds' story might be both the most difficult and the most important book you ever read. With unflinching honesty and raw emotion, she details what happens after her husband is fatally injured in a bicycle accident. She finds they hadn't adequately planned for a worst case scenario and that made the aftermath more complicated then it should have been. Since his death, she's made it her mission to help others be better prepared. The book includes checklists and vital information about the conversations, decisions, and legal paperwork you need in place if (or when) the worst happens. FYI: the book contains profanity, graphic medical descriptions, heart wrenching emotion and the kick-in-the-butt you may need to finally get that paperwork done.

  15. 5 out of 5

    Brad Lockey

    More memoir than a guide to the important stuff. Around page 160 or so there was a checklist of things to do and sign-on's, password, usernames, etc. to share with your partner. I saw this as a massive value, and the rest was just a book. As explained, far too many people are not prepared to be hit by a car tomorrow - and that is a scary thing. If you have a significant other, kids or both .... get to work and get prepared now. The aftermath is tough and mistakes can occur when grieving and having t More memoir than a guide to the important stuff. Around page 160 or so there was a checklist of things to do and sign-on's, password, usernames, etc. to share with your partner. I saw this as a massive value, and the rest was just a book. As explained, far too many people are not prepared to be hit by a car tomorrow - and that is a scary thing. If you have a significant other, kids or both .... get to work and get prepared now. The aftermath is tough and mistakes can occur when grieving and having to deal with these things. Also, I had no idea about there being such a thing as a "digital power of attorney". We live in a complex world.

  16. 4 out of 5

    Sara Smith

    A gut wrenching book about getting your financial life in order. I dare you to read this and not need to organize all your stuff in case the worst happens. Chanel and her husband Jose didn't expect tragedy and neither do most Americans, but it's going to happen to someone. You might as well be prepared just in case. The only thing I didn't like about this book is that I prefer books you are supposed to write in to be more of a workbook format, but I can understand for ease of storytelling that t A gut wrenching book about getting your financial life in order. I dare you to read this and not need to organize all your stuff in case the worst happens. Chanel and her husband Jose didn't expect tragedy and neither do most Americans, but it's going to happen to someone. You might as well be prepared just in case. The only thing I didn't like about this book is that I prefer books you are supposed to write in to be more of a workbook format, but I can understand for ease of storytelling that this style was picked.

  17. 5 out of 5

    Paul

    "We don't do death (or financial planning) well" in these times. Yet avoiding these topics will end up biting us in the ass when things go wrong, as they did for Chanel Reynolds, the courageous author of What Matters Most. The book is part financial guide and part gripping story of her husband's unexpected death. The money stuff is interesting and important - I guarantee you haven't thought of everything you'll need in the worst case scenario. But this is way more than a financial planning check "We don't do death (or financial planning) well" in these times. Yet avoiding these topics will end up biting us in the ass when things go wrong, as they did for Chanel Reynolds, the courageous author of What Matters Most. The book is part financial guide and part gripping story of her husband's unexpected death. The money stuff is interesting and important - I guarantee you haven't thought of everything you'll need in the worst case scenario. But this is way more than a financial planning checklist. It’s raw, honest, surprisingly funny, and a great read.

  18. 5 out of 5

    Brian

    There are two books here: the first, an unflinching account of the author after suddenly losing her husband in a bike accident and a practical, actionable guide to planning for life after death. I found myself skimming the personal details of her story and taking copious notes on the rest. After dragging my feet for several years, this was the book that convinced me to call our lawyers and set up our wills and estate planning.

  19. 4 out of 5

    Victoria

    Part memoir and part practical planner. Author shares her personal stories in dealing with her life tragedies. But she also shares some helpful checklists and worksheets to help us face emergencies, make death plans, organize important documents, review insurance, etc. These practical lists are what I was most interested in. As her first section describes, what to do when "life goes sideways."

  20. 4 out of 5

    Jane

    Chanel Reynolds' What matters most : the get your shit together guide to wills, money, insurance, and life's "what-ifs" has an excellent concept in her personal account of a tragic time in her life; however, I personally do not appreciate all the profanity in doing so. I appreciate the checklists provided, though as well as her advice for friends or anyone who needs to help others.

  21. 4 out of 5

    Jennifer

    This is an important book that I have been wanting to read for awhile and which I think everyone should read--I just happened to pick it up right the beginning of the coronavirus pandemic and had a very hard time engaging in it--although I think that is a result of the current times and not of the book itself.

  22. 5 out of 5

    Suzi

    I needed a get off my ass book to propel me into changing and updating vital documents. This was a very sad and uplifting challenge. The title is great. Lots of good information but not exactly what I needed.

  23. 4 out of 5

    Kim

    This book was more of a gut-punch memoir than I was expecting, but it's a great read both for that memoir and for the advice it dispenses. Just prepare yourself if you are someone who is overly empathetic or triggered by death, because it is ROUGH.

  24. 5 out of 5

    Christi Koenig

    I was expecting more on planning things like wills and insurance ahead of time. This was partly a memoir of the year when the author's husband died (about 70%) and partly what to do if your spouse dies unexpectedly. So, it was a good book, but not what I was expecting.

  25. 5 out of 5

    kendra

    SOLID ADVICE with a beautiful reflection about love and loss

  26. 4 out of 5

    Wendy Phraner

    Well written, imperative stuff. Tough subject and tragic story but I’m thankful for the lessons shared.

  27. 5 out of 5

    Christine Slocum

    Surprisingly compelling storyline, as I was expecting a will and advanced care directive how-to. Very much recommended.

  28. 4 out of 5

    Kate

    Not helpful- mostly memoir without much guidance

  29. 4 out of 5

    Allison

    Intertwines practical advice with a memoir of the author's own experience of becoming a widow at the age of 39.

  30. 4 out of 5

    Janet

    I have a few books of this ilk and this one was the best. Reynolds conveys urgency while still saying you can do this. I will be following up with the website and getting my shit together.

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