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If you’re going to let me burn, the least you could do is stick around and watch the show. You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering is a naked and powerful poetic portrait of love, heartbreak, and restoration. In this book of 200 poems from noteworthy Instagram poet Jon Lupin—better known as The Poetry Bandit—you’ll find a poetic trellis with heartfelt words and raw emotion coiling If you’re going to let me burn, the least you could do is stick around and watch the show. You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering is a naked and powerful poetic portrait of love, heartbreak, and restoration. In this book of 200 poems from noteworthy Instagram poet Jon Lupin—better known as The Poetry Bandit—you’ll find a poetic trellis with heartfelt words and raw emotion coiling in and around its frame. Immerse yourself in the thoughts, musings, and wisdom that more than 100,000 Instagram followers have already found with The Poetry Bandit’s You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering.


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If you’re going to let me burn, the least you could do is stick around and watch the show. You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering is a naked and powerful poetic portrait of love, heartbreak, and restoration. In this book of 200 poems from noteworthy Instagram poet Jon Lupin—better known as The Poetry Bandit—you’ll find a poetic trellis with heartfelt words and raw emotion coiling If you’re going to let me burn, the least you could do is stick around and watch the show. You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering is a naked and powerful poetic portrait of love, heartbreak, and restoration. In this book of 200 poems from noteworthy Instagram poet Jon Lupin—better known as The Poetry Bandit—you’ll find a poetic trellis with heartfelt words and raw emotion coiling in and around its frame. Immerse yourself in the thoughts, musings, and wisdom that more than 100,000 Instagram followers have already found with The Poetry Bandit’s You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering.

30 review for You Only Love Me When I'm Suffering: Poems

  1. 5 out of 5

    Jess the Shelf-Declared Bibliophile

    Beautiful poetry. Some sweet, some hopeful, some saddening. It was a good mix of moods and I appreciate the glimpse into his mind and heart through his words.

  2. 5 out of 5

    Matthew

    It’s almost the end of National Poetry Month, and I am finally getting around to reading some. This was good, but I wasn’t wowed. I liked that this wasn’t your average refrigerator magnet poetry that seems to be trending these days, but nothing really stood out for me. There was some clever word play and everything fit nicely together, but nothing strong.

  3. 4 out of 5

    Sincerely Bluejay

    While this was not quite what I was expecting, I loved the wide array of word play and references throughout this book. It took me a day to read, but I admit I had to stop after every few pages to digest everything - the voice was clear and the emotions we're bitterly raw. It was a wonderful read,but definitely not for the faint of heart - especially if you take everything and try to relate. While this was not quite what I was expecting, I loved the wide array of word play and references throughout this book. It took me a day to read, but I admit I had to stop after every few pages to digest everything - the voice was clear and the emotions we're bitterly raw. It was a wonderful read,but definitely not for the faint of heart - especially if you take everything and try to relate.

  4. 4 out of 5

    Megan Martucci

    Jon Lupin is sad. We know that he's sad because he reminds us of this in every poem. There is absolutely no room for analysis here; Lupin uses basic vocabulary to really hit home the fact that he has dealt with unimaginable sadness. In case you forget, there is a lovely little reminder near the end on page 165, "I am a broken man". This incoherent collection was so difficult to finish. After my initial shock at how poorly constructed the majority of the poems were, the endless typos had me wonde Jon Lupin is sad. We know that he's sad because he reminds us of this in every poem. There is absolutely no room for analysis here; Lupin uses basic vocabulary to really hit home the fact that he has dealt with unimaginable sadness. In case you forget, there is a lovely little reminder near the end on page 165, "I am a broken man". This incoherent collection was so difficult to finish. After my initial shock at how poorly constructed the majority of the poems were, the endless typos had me wondering how on earth this was ever published. Most of these are just plain laziness and I can't understand how an editor wouldn't have caught them. My favourite is definitely from "Frozen Shoulders": "If you're shoulder isn't a balmy 98 degrees, then I'm afraid I'm staying put" (128) Or maybe it's "Intentional Confessional"? "I never stopped reading the lines in your face, for the always fell into place" (167) I kid, my absolute favourite has to be from "Gold Rush" (186) "...in the river of your heart, hiding beneath the stones and the sand that life has puts there to hide it" I am not making this up. Whether I'm nit-picking or not, this never should have made it into the final product. I genuinely can't take this book or the emotions it's trying to convey seriously when it reads like this. The random alliteration and rhyming schemes show that Lupin is not writing for himself but for the people who will read his work, making it feel strained and disingenuous. Writing poetry on a typewriter doesn't mean your poems are good. My new resolution for 2021 is to create a time machine so I can go back and strangle whoever broke this man's heart so that this book would never be written.

  5. 4 out of 5

    Amber

    I’m not a poetry person, but I always think I want to be. The “Dirge” section was my favorite.

  6. 4 out of 5

    Alesia Cate

    There were definitely many poems that I loved and bookmarked. Sometimes the imagery and the wording was elementary, but I still enjoyed it overall. I am an alcoholic in recovery, so it was exciting to see recovery lingo and references — I wasn’t expecting it. Would recommend. He can refine his craft. I look forward to seeing more work from him.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Andy Nguyen

    The collection is incoherent. I wish there were some kind of topic or narrative or even something in the poems that is related to the chapters' or the book's title, even just remotely. Instead we have a bunch of random poems that sometimes are so vague, abstract, and disjointed within themselves they almost appear pretentious. Also, I feel like the typewriter font was really unfitting, although I have no idea why. The collection is incoherent. I wish there were some kind of topic or narrative or even something in the poems that is related to the chapters' or the book's title, even just remotely. Instead we have a bunch of random poems that sometimes are so vague, abstract, and disjointed within themselves they almost appear pretentious. Also, I feel like the typewriter font was really unfitting, although I have no idea why.

  8. 5 out of 5

    A.R. McKenna

    You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering is a beautiful, raw, unflinching collection of poems that spoke to my heart and reminds me that I am not alone in my battle against the darkness of depression. Jon Lupin is extremely talented and I admire his veracity; his poems are so fluid and seamless and I just couldn’t get enough of them. As a fellow recovering alcoholic, I applaud him for speaking out against the disease of alcoholism especially since he is a male and alcohol is so intertwined with the r You Only Love Me When I’m Suffering is a beautiful, raw, unflinching collection of poems that spoke to my heart and reminds me that I am not alone in my battle against the darkness of depression. Jon Lupin is extremely talented and I admire his veracity; his poems are so fluid and seamless and I just couldn’t get enough of them. As a fellow recovering alcoholic, I applaud him for speaking out against the disease of alcoholism especially since he is a male and alcohol is so intertwined with the rigid identity of masculinity. It takes strength and courage to share your pain and fears with the world, and Mr. Lupin proves that he is an amazing poet with the empathy and kindness that the world needs more of.

  9. 5 out of 5

    Miriam

    I have very specific and unfortunately negative feelings towards this book. This book was very pretentious but also just a mess. It felt like this was written by a kid who is taking a poetry course who didn’t show up to half of the classes but still thinks they know more than the teacher. A lot of the poems were very messy and disjointed plus there were several typos (which in my opinion should never happen in a published work). It seemed like he would just think of ethereal phrases and then sti I have very specific and unfortunately negative feelings towards this book. This book was very pretentious but also just a mess. It felt like this was written by a kid who is taking a poetry course who didn’t show up to half of the classes but still thinks they know more than the teacher. A lot of the poems were very messy and disjointed plus there were several typos (which in my opinion should never happen in a published work). It seemed like he would just think of ethereal phrases and then stick them in random poems that did not fit together. Suffice it to say this poetry collection was not my taste and I hate read it.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Myra

    I was browsing through the poetry section of my bookstore, looking for nothing in particular, when I spotted "You only love me when I'm suffering." Lupin had me at the title. The poetry bandit, as Lupin is known, is a guerrilla of metaphor. I earmarked a good third of the book, trying to treasure the words. I think my favorite poem is "The Lord's Day." I read it, and my stomach somersaulted. I feel most broken on a Sunday, when I'm reminded another week begins without you My dad died on a Sunday. This I was browsing through the poetry section of my bookstore, looking for nothing in particular, when I spotted "You only love me when I'm suffering." Lupin had me at the title. The poetry bandit, as Lupin is known, is a guerrilla of metaphor. I earmarked a good third of the book, trying to treasure the words. I think my favorite poem is "The Lord's Day." I read it, and my stomach somersaulted. I feel most broken on a Sunday, when I'm reminded another week begins without you My dad died on a Sunday. This is a remarkable book of word art. Undoubtedly, I'll reread it, and again.

  11. 5 out of 5

    Samantha

    This was more uplifting than I expected, a great, quick subway read.

  12. 4 out of 5

    Rebekah Williams

    absolutely beautiful

  13. 5 out of 5

    Kenzie Taylor

    I had such high hopes for this book...I heard amazing things about this author so my expectations were extremely high and I was left slightly disappointed. It wasn't a "bad book" by any stretch of the imagination but it was not at all what I was hoping for. There are good poems in here and his style is lovely but I wish I could've had more backbone to each poem. I feel like they weren't what I was expecting, I wanted them to tug at my heart strings and make me feel but instead, I just found myse I had such high hopes for this book...I heard amazing things about this author so my expectations were extremely high and I was left slightly disappointed. It wasn't a "bad book" by any stretch of the imagination but it was not at all what I was hoping for. There are good poems in here and his style is lovely but I wish I could've had more backbone to each poem. I feel like they weren't what I was expecting, I wanted them to tug at my heart strings and make me feel but instead, I just found myself saying "true" or "interesting" and moving on to the next one hoping it was going to have a little bit more feeling or intensity behind it. I think I would've enjoyed the book more if my expectations weren't so high. I do want to stress, this was a good book, it just wasn't a book for me.

  14. 4 out of 5

    Becca Jacquin

    It pains me to give this such a low rating, but after following him on Instagram this book just fell flat for me. Maybe it's because I feel like there's more breadth with the poetry online, whereas this was just too much of the same poem rewritten for too many pages. Every so often I would find one that I had to jot down for distant reading, but those were rare. I will note that maybe if I had read this in shorter sittings, a couple poems each day rather than devouring a third of the book at a ti It pains me to give this such a low rating, but after following him on Instagram this book just fell flat for me. Maybe it's because I feel like there's more breadth with the poetry online, whereas this was just too much of the same poem rewritten for too many pages. Every so often I would find one that I had to jot down for distant reading, but those were rare. I will note that maybe if I had read this in shorter sittings, a couple poems each day rather than devouring a third of the book at a time I would've enjoyed it more.

  15. 5 out of 5

    Brooke Goodwin

    I’ve fallen in love with this book! I was hooked from the very first poem! “Anthems”, “Crowns”, “Controller”, “Little Dragons”, “Closer”, “Clean a Dirty Mirror”, “There’s Something Different About You”...I could go on and on about these poems, but I don’t know if I can pick just one favorite. Jon has a way of leaving pieces of raw emotions sprinkled throughout his poems, sometimes in small portions, and other times in a ways that make me feel those emotions as my own. I can certainly say I will be I’ve fallen in love with this book! I was hooked from the very first poem! “Anthems”, “Crowns”, “Controller”, “Little Dragons”, “Closer”, “Clean a Dirty Mirror”, “There’s Something Different About You”...I could go on and on about these poems, but I don’t know if I can pick just one favorite. Jon has a way of leaving pieces of raw emotions sprinkled throughout his poems, sometimes in small portions, and other times in a ways that make me feel those emotions as my own. I can certainly say I will be following The Poetry Bandit from here on!

  16. 5 out of 5

    Alison Sea

    I think I'm going to give this a 5 out of 5 stars. I usually HATE modern poetry. Like, reckless abandon, fucking hate it. I really liked this one though. I thought the lines breaks were more intentional than a lot of other modern poetry books I've read. This is the main thing: if you took away all the line breaks and whatnot, the prose would still be absolutely beautiful. Near the end it seemed like there were some typos? Or maybe a dialect I'm not used to. I think I'm going to give this a 5 out of 5 stars. I usually HATE modern poetry. Like, reckless abandon, fucking hate it. I really liked this one though. I thought the lines breaks were more intentional than a lot of other modern poetry books I've read. This is the main thing: if you took away all the line breaks and whatnot, the prose would still be absolutely beautiful. Near the end it seemed like there were some typos? Or maybe a dialect I'm not used to.

  17. 4 out of 5

    Casey Couch

    2.5 stars - I definitely expected this to be wayyyy more emo than it turned out to be, based on the title and the author’s background. So my experience may be altered by my expectations, but I just kept waiting for Lupin to dig deeper and didn’t feel that he did through the majority of this collection. I did, however, like that many of his poems read like actual poetry compared to most modern collections.

  18. 5 out of 5

    Andy

    The collection is incoherent. I wish there were some kind of topic or narrative or even something in the poems that is related to the chapters' or the book's title, even just remotely. Instead we have a bunch of random poems that sometimes are so vague, abstract, and disjointed within themselves they almost appear pretentious. Also, I feel like the typewriter font was really unfitting, although I have no idea why. The collection is incoherent. I wish there were some kind of topic or narrative or even something in the poems that is related to the chapters' or the book's title, even just remotely. Instead we have a bunch of random poems that sometimes are so vague, abstract, and disjointed within themselves they almost appear pretentious. Also, I feel like the typewriter font was really unfitting, although I have no idea why.

  19. 5 out of 5

    Steven

    Bitterly disappointing! Hard to finish and I had such high hopes cause he is a local boy! But I realized he only got published cause he is popular on Instagram! Ugh Complete copy cat off Sin and other new age poets but this guy misses the mark! Just so whiny and his metaphors don’t make a lot of sense! Like an aspiring grade 6 poet!

  20. 5 out of 5

    Rhiley Jade

    This poetry collection had a few pretty poems, but a majority of them were average at best. It was the same reoccurring theme of broken hearts and failed love. There was no depth. I wish the author had delved into other topics-Anything other than "the one that got away". I probably won't be picking up another of this author's books. This poetry collection had a few pretty poems, but a majority of them were average at best. It was the same reoccurring theme of broken hearts and failed love. There was no depth. I wish the author had delved into other topics-Anything other than "the one that got away". I probably won't be picking up another of this author's books.

  21. 5 out of 5

    Jennifer MacMullin

    This wasn’t really for me, but I think that’s mostly my fault, because I only read the title and was expecting something different. I mean, it’s plenty emotional, but the majority of it is about heartbreak and I couldn’t connect with it. There were a few pages that caught my eye, but nothing outstanding. It wasn’t what I hoped it’d be

  22. 4 out of 5

    Lynette

    I wanted to like this. I wanted to feel the agony and gut wrenching feeling that poetry gives you. I never got that. None were stand out or hit me with their truth. Honestly, the flow of most of them was off to the point they didn’t make sense.

  23. 5 out of 5

    Jenna

    It was ok, there were some that stood out that I really liked but the majority are just average love poems. I guess I’m looking for poetry that isn’t about love because I want things that describe what I’m going through with mental illness and acceptance and stuff. Still a cute book

  24. 4 out of 5

    Christina

    First poetry book I've read out of school. Would definitely buy another book by this author and already follow him on Instagram. First poetry book I've read out of school. Would definitely buy another book by this author and already follow him on Instagram.

  25. 5 out of 5

    Samantha

    The words are beautifully written, but I don't see something that sets it apart from other works of love poetry. The words are beautifully written, but I don't see something that sets it apart from other works of love poetry.

  26. 4 out of 5

    Jacob Lasher

    Outstanding. I didn’t want it to end! Not sure if he has more books of poetry... I am going to search for them though!

  27. 4 out of 5

    Malik Wise

    You only love the title.

  28. 4 out of 5

    Megan Chester

    Not really my cup of tea but well written.

  29. 5 out of 5

    Olivia Leskowitz

    There are some very great poems mixed in here, but to get to them, you have to go through many eye rolls.

  30. 4 out of 5

    Candace Perrin

    Filled with raw emotion. So painful and freeing.

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