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Standing By: The Making of an American Military Family in a Time of War

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Tarcher, 2009, As new, Bright, clean, tight. Short remainder mark, otherwise new, unused, in dust jacket. [Military life, U.S. Navy] Out-of-print and antiquarian booksellers since 1933. We pack and ship with care.


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Tarcher, 2009, As new, Bright, clean, tight. Short remainder mark, otherwise new, unused, in dust jacket. [Military life, U.S. Navy] Out-of-print and antiquarian booksellers since 1933. We pack and ship with care.

30 review for Standing By: The Making of an American Military Family in a Time of War

  1. 4 out of 5

    Dewitt

    This is both a candid, personal account by Buckholtz of her ordeal as the spouse of a Navy wing commander deployed in Iraq--an ordeal of long- distance love and of single parenting and home-making as she remains stationed in the Northwest--and a literary and journalistic consideration of the role of military wife (think Penelope in the Odyssey), including interviews with a broad range of Buckholtz's counterparts, research into Naval traditions and family policies, and revealing statistics about This is both a candid, personal account by Buckholtz of her ordeal as the spouse of a Navy wing commander deployed in Iraq--an ordeal of long- distance love and of single parenting and home-making as she remains stationed in the Northwest--and a literary and journalistic consideration of the role of military wife (think Penelope in the Odyssey), including interviews with a broad range of Buckholtz's counterparts, research into Naval traditions and family policies, and revealing statistics about religion, gender, and the psychological fallout of this situation. As a feminist, a Jew, and an intellectual, Buckholtz is an unlikely candidate for the "hive mentality" of military family life, but emerges with loving commitment to the person her husband is (and to his commitment to service) as well as with confidence in her own resourcefulness as a wife, mother, and person.

  2. 5 out of 5

    Siobhan Fallon

    Alison Buckholtz’s memoir is a universal story of friendship, family and endurance that reveals the history of the American military spouse from Revolutionary War camp followers to her own experience as a Navy wife in the post-9/11 world. Standing By is sometimes funny, sometimes heartbreaking, but always a beautiful, honest book about the toil and triumph of modern military life.

  3. 4 out of 5

    Rebecca

    Read Harder 2017: Book about War This book has been on my shelves for years, I believe I bought it during my husband's deployment in 2010, and I've had it earmarked all year to read for this item in the Read Harder Challenge. As a bonus incentive, I also recently met the author, Alison Buckholtz, at a book signing for a book by another military spouse (Siobhan Fallon for her new book The Confusion of Languages). This is a beautifully written memoir, accurately reflecting the highs and lows of mil Read Harder 2017: Book about War This book has been on my shelves for years, I believe I bought it during my husband's deployment in 2010, and I've had it earmarked all year to read for this item in the Read Harder Challenge. As a bonus incentive, I also recently met the author, Alison Buckholtz, at a book signing for a book by another military spouse (Siobhan Fallon for her new book The Confusion of Languages). This is a beautifully written memoir, accurately reflecting the highs and lows of military spouse life, especially for someone (like me) who never saw herself as a "military wife." I was deeply impressed by how Buckholtz truly opened her heart and soul to the reader, such a gift. I also especially appreciated that she brought her Jewish faith and love of literature and poetry into the book. It's not easy to share some of the intimate emotional details (both good and bad) about military spouse life that Buckholtz shares to my friends, must less to put them out there for all to read. I admire her bravery, and I am so glad she did share her story. Highly recommend, even for non-military friends, because the writing is just so lovely and thoughtful.

  4. 5 out of 5

    Sarah

    Engaging, thoughtful memoir of a contemporary Navy spouse. The author doesn't fit the image many have of a military wife, so it's an especially good read for someone more familiar with civilian lifestyles. Tales of her kids' poignant adjustments, and her own, express the deployment experience with nuance and precision. Engaging, thoughtful memoir of a contemporary Navy spouse. The author doesn't fit the image many have of a military wife, so it's an especially good read for someone more familiar with civilian lifestyles. Tales of her kids' poignant adjustments, and her own, express the deployment experience with nuance and precision.

  5. 5 out of 5

    Taylor Bagwell

    As a new military spouse, I wanted a book that would give me insights into military life. Buckholtz shared how being a military spouse can be challenging, especially if you have children. This story draws on the interdependence of military members and their families; the wives who are left behind when their partners are deployed rely on each other.

  6. 4 out of 5

    Cindy Hudson

    Alison Buckholtz never imagined she’d be the wife of someone in the military, so when she fell in love with and married a navy man, she found herself navigating an alien world. And when she and her husband, Scott, began to have children, she discovered the tightly knit community of other military wives helped her through his long deployments on an aircraft carrier. Her memoir, Standing By: The Making of an American Military Family in a Time of War, is a candid look at what life is like for couple Alison Buckholtz never imagined she’d be the wife of someone in the military, so when she fell in love with and married a navy man, she found herself navigating an alien world. And when she and her husband, Scott, began to have children, she discovered the tightly knit community of other military wives helped her through his long deployments on an aircraft carrier. Her memoir, Standing By: The Making of an American Military Family in a Time of War, is a candid look at what life is like for couples, moms especially, who are raising children as their spouses are assigned to remote and often dangerous locations for months, sometimes even a year or more. Buckholtz writes with honesty about her mixed feelings of war, politics, and the policies that rule how members of the military are assigned. She shares her frustrations about being a single parent while her husband is away, and the challenges she faces helping her children deal with their own separation grief. Sprinkled in with Buckholtz’s personal narrative are stories of other women she meets, mostly during the time her family spent in Anacortes, Washington. Through her eyes readers get a glimpse of a world that is unknown to most people who are not part of the extended military family. Buckholtz weaves together a story that covers the historical role played by military wives while also talking about how their role continues to change in current times. Standing By can provide insight to the challenges parents and families in the military face. I believe it’s a good choice for someone in a similar situation as hers, extended family members who may be wondering how to help military families, and even readers who have no personal connection to someone serving. The publisher provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Kelley

    now that the school is winding down of COURSE I can actually start reading again. I picked up this book at Bookstock and I was inspired to start reading it once Memorial Day rolled around. The book is a memoir of Allison Buckholz and her family during her Navy husband's deployment during the Iraq War. I thought she did a good job explaining the nuances of the military and her story seemed to resonate with many other military wives who shared her plight. My only criticisms was the lack of energy now that the school is winding down of COURSE I can actually start reading again. I picked up this book at Bookstock and I was inspired to start reading it once Memorial Day rolled around. The book is a memoir of Allison Buckholz and her family during her Navy husband's deployment during the Iraq War. I thought she did a good job explaining the nuances of the military and her story seemed to resonate with many other military wives who shared her plight. My only criticisms was the lack of energy in the book, her short chapters covered a multitude of topics without any real resolution and as a mother I related to her, but I wasn't necessarily moved to tears or laughter by any of her words. Overall, solid read but not sure if I would ever come back to it.

  8. 5 out of 5

    Carrie

    This book was frustrating in that it drew me in but also bored me! I wish it were more chronological. It was hard for me to shake the feeling that the author was majorly going on the bright side at some points. Her judginess about non military mindsets consistently got on my nerves because most civilians I know, even pre-9/11, didn't look down on military service and neither did I. However, it was definitely an interesting book at times and it showed me how difficult and rewarding this lifestyle This book was frustrating in that it drew me in but also bored me! I wish it were more chronological. It was hard for me to shake the feeling that the author was majorly going on the bright side at some points. Her judginess about non military mindsets consistently got on my nerves because most civilians I know, even pre-9/11, didn't look down on military service and neither did I. However, it was definitely an interesting book at times and it showed me how difficult and rewarding this lifestyle can be.

  9. 4 out of 5

    Bev

    Great read. Having been an Army wife for over 20 yrs(retired since 1987) I could relate to so much of the book though our time was the Vietnam era. I was also new to the military life and learned as I went. I would do it all over again...such wonderful people we met along the way and great experiences. It has certainly given me an appreciation of our military, of our country and of the freedom we have. Would recommend the book to everyone! Alison is an excellent writer.

  10. 5 out of 5

    Virginia Pulver

    This book provides some excellent insights into what life is like for those who make the military an integral part of their lives. I raised my own kids as Air Force dependents - I was acticve duty for over 20 years and I also was a traditional Air Force dependent wife (before I joined myself). The story resonates with me. I recommend it to people who have never been through the experience - it may change your opinion on their world. (FYI: I also served in Peace Corps)

  11. 4 out of 5

    Tayla

    This was a really great read. Buckholtz does a wonderful job expressing the conflicting emotions experienced as a military spouse through her recounting of the experiences of herself and her fellow spouses leading up to and during a deployment.

  12. 5 out of 5

    Katie

    Best book I've read in a longtime about the struggles of life as a military life and challenges as well as ways to address tough issues with your children Best book I've read in a longtime about the struggles of life as a military life and challenges as well as ways to address tough issues with your children

  13. 5 out of 5

    Neligh

    http://www.standingbybook.com/Home_fi... http://www.standingbybook.com/Home_fi...

  14. 5 out of 5

    Erin

    A relief to read about someone else's experiences with having a deployed love one. Even though our situations were dissimilar, many of our feelings and problems were the same. A relief to read about someone else's experiences with having a deployed love one. Even though our situations were dissimilar, many of our feelings and problems were the same.

  15. 5 out of 5

    Ayla

    I cried through every other chapter. It hits too close to home, considering it was written by an author living in Anacortes. Very honest, and well-written.

  16. 4 out of 5

    Lanie Tankard

    Here's my review of the reissued edition on Women's Memoirs: http://womensmemoirs.com/memoir-book-... Here's my review of the reissued edition on Women's Memoirs: http://womensmemoirs.com/memoir-book-...

  17. 4 out of 5

    Debbie

    Accurate portrayal of a difficult life.

  18. 5 out of 5

    Beth

    Great book for a military brat or spouse... Great insight to things an Army brat has always felt but couldn't put into words... Great book for a military brat or spouse... Great insight to things an Army brat has always felt but couldn't put into words...

  19. 4 out of 5

    Jen L

    Though I've never been in their shoes; this puts the readers in the mind and life of military families and struggles therein. Great read. Though I've never been in their shoes; this puts the readers in the mind and life of military families and struggles therein. Great read.

  20. 4 out of 5

    Bonnie

  21. 5 out of 5

    Laura

  22. 4 out of 5

    Erica

  23. 4 out of 5

    Reader

  24. 4 out of 5

    Debbie

  25. 4 out of 5

    Megan Druckman

  26. 4 out of 5

    Ellen Podgorski

  27. 4 out of 5

    Suzanne Podberesky

  28. 4 out of 5

    Theresa

  29. 5 out of 5

    Janelle

  30. 5 out of 5

    Amy

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