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She was known to the world as Emily Doe when she stunned millions with a letter. Brock Turner had been sentenced to just six months in county jail after he was found sexually assaulting her on Stanford’s campus. Her victim impact statement was posted on BuzzFeed, where it instantly went viral–viewed by eleven million people within four days, it was translated globally and She was known to the world as Emily Doe when she stunned millions with a letter. Brock Turner had been sentenced to just six months in county jail after he was found sexually assaulting her on Stanford’s campus. Her victim impact statement was posted on BuzzFeed, where it instantly went viral–viewed by eleven million people within four days, it was translated globally and read on the floor of Congress; it inspired changes in California law and the recall of the judge in the case. Thousands wrote to say that she had given them the courage to share their own experiences of assault for the first time. Now she reclaims her identity to tell her story of trauma, transcendence, and the power of words. It was the perfect case, in many ways–there were eyewitnesses, Turner ran away, physical evidence was immediately secured. But her struggles with isolation and shame during the aftermath and the trial reveal the oppression victims face in even the best-case scenarios. Her story illuminates a culture biased to protect perpetrators, indicts a criminal justice system designed to fail the most vulnerable, and, ultimately, shines with the courage required to move through suffering and live a full and beautiful life. Know My Name will forever transform the way we think about sexual assault, challenging our beliefs about what is acceptable and speaking truth to the tumultuous reality of healing. It also introduces readers to an extraordinary writer, one whose words have already changed our world. Entwining pain, resilience, and humor, this memoir will stand as a modern classic.


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She was known to the world as Emily Doe when she stunned millions with a letter. Brock Turner had been sentenced to just six months in county jail after he was found sexually assaulting her on Stanford’s campus. Her victim impact statement was posted on BuzzFeed, where it instantly went viral–viewed by eleven million people within four days, it was translated globally and She was known to the world as Emily Doe when she stunned millions with a letter. Brock Turner had been sentenced to just six months in county jail after he was found sexually assaulting her on Stanford’s campus. Her victim impact statement was posted on BuzzFeed, where it instantly went viral–viewed by eleven million people within four days, it was translated globally and read on the floor of Congress; it inspired changes in California law and the recall of the judge in the case. Thousands wrote to say that she had given them the courage to share their own experiences of assault for the first time. Now she reclaims her identity to tell her story of trauma, transcendence, and the power of words. It was the perfect case, in many ways–there were eyewitnesses, Turner ran away, physical evidence was immediately secured. But her struggles with isolation and shame during the aftermath and the trial reveal the oppression victims face in even the best-case scenarios. Her story illuminates a culture biased to protect perpetrators, indicts a criminal justice system designed to fail the most vulnerable, and, ultimately, shines with the courage required to move through suffering and live a full and beautiful life. Know My Name will forever transform the way we think about sexual assault, challenging our beliefs about what is acceptable and speaking truth to the tumultuous reality of healing. It also introduces readers to an extraordinary writer, one whose words have already changed our world. Entwining pain, resilience, and humor, this memoir will stand as a modern classic.

30 review for Know My Name

  1. 5 out of 5

    Emily May

    This book was amazing. And I want you to know I'm not just saying that because this is the memoir of the woman who was sexually assaulted by Brock Turner and it was always going to be important. True, I expected the book would be important, probably powerful and moving, but I didn't realize what an incredible writer Miller actually is. Her words are arresting, gripping, and poetic. She takes us back to that night and through all of the horror and humiliation of the aftermath and trial. But mostly This book was amazing. And I want you to know I'm not just saying that because this is the memoir of the woman who was sexually assaulted by Brock Turner and it was always going to be important. True, I expected the book would be important, probably powerful and moving, but I didn't realize what an incredible writer Miller actually is. Her words are arresting, gripping, and poetic. She takes us back to that night and through all of the horror and humiliation of the aftermath and trial. But mostly, she takes us inside her state of mind and what it was like to wake up and discover someone, a stranger, had taken advantage of her unconscious body. She goes into a lot of detail, so take this as a warning to those especially sensitive to graphic depiction of sexual assault. Know My Name is not just one thing. It's tinged with frustration that America's legal system fails to punish predators if they are wealthy and accomplished. It's a woman saying I'm not just a body; not just some faceless Emily Doe. You should know my name. It's an attempt to change things for other women. And also, sadly, it is Miller's attempt to reclaim her own story and become the hero of it once again. As she said in an interview that still rips my heart out: My dream is to write children's books. I felt no parent is going to want me as a role model if I'm just the discarded, drunk, half-naked body behind a dumpster. Ms Miller, I will read any books of yours to my children. I don't normally comment on book covers, but there was one detail here I really appreciated. The gold veins on the hardcover of Know My Name are there to represent kintsugi, the Japanese art of mending broken pottery with powdered gold and lacquer. It is a celebration of breaks and scars, instead of an attempt to hide them, and shows how even broken things can be made whole again. A perfect visual representation of this powerful memoir. Facebook | Instagram

  2. 4 out of 5

    Thomas

    Stunning. An absolutely stunning memoir, one of the best I have ever read. In Know My Name, Chanel Miller reclaims her identity after the press described her as “unconscious intoxicated woman” in the aftermath of when rapist Brock Turner assaulted her. I remember feeling inspired, impressed, and in awe of Miller’s victim impact statement as Emily Doe when it came out in 2016. Miller brings that same level of strength and eloquence to this memoir. When I read my favorite memoirists, I get this fee Stunning. An absolutely stunning memoir, one of the best I have ever read. In Know My Name, Chanel Miller reclaims her identity after the press described her as “unconscious intoxicated woman” in the aftermath of when rapist Brock Turner assaulted her. I remember feeling inspired, impressed, and in awe of Miller’s victim impact statement as Emily Doe when it came out in 2016. Miller brings that same level of strength and eloquence to this memoir. When I read my favorite memoirists, I get this feeling of familiarity, this sense of okay, I know who this person is, I can really see them. That’s how I felt throughout reading Know My Name. Miller takes back her power – after having been reduced to an unconscious victim – by writing beautifully and vulnerably about herself and her life, both before and after the assault. She includes so many heartwarming details that paint a picture of a woman who’s a loving sister, a witty artist and creator, as well as a person who has insecurities like all of us do. When I read details about her family, like how she caught her younger sister’s vomit in her hands to take care of her as a child or how she would listen to her dad sing along to music while cooking, I felt this immense sense of gratitude and closeness, like I wanted to thank her for making us remember that victims of trauma and assault are more than just what happened to them. Miller does a thorough job of detailing the impact of her trial itself, too, like how her sister had to continuously rearrange her school and work schedule because of court dates that kept getting delayed, and how Miller drained her bank account to cover expenses such as buying appropriate clothing for court. Miller’s writing itself is superb. The way she details the moments after she woke up in the hospital, how she describes her panic attacks and emotional outbursts in private and when she testified in court, her narration of the painstaking climb to heal and recover herself in a world with so many people who sought to discredit her – I felt like I was right there with her. Her prose is incisive and gets to the point without embellishment, and yet, she still captures the full emotional rollercoaster of her lived experience. I cried several times reading this memoir, both because of the anguish her rapist and the patriarchal legal system put her through, as well as because of how inspired and moved I felt by Miller’s self-awareness, her fortitude, and her courage in sharing her story. She’s put in hundreds and thousands of hours into processing this trauma and it shows in her insightfulness. I highlighted so many quotes from this book so it feels hard to choose just a couple to show in this review, but here’s one I loved, in which Miller describes her response after receiving kind letters from people who read her victim impact statement: "For the past year I had been raking through comments looking for signs of support. I dug through opinion pieces in local newspapers searching for someone to stand up for me. I locked myself in my car in parking lots crying into hotlines, convinced I was losing my mind. All year the loneliness had followed me, in the stairwell at work, in Philly, in the wooden witness stand, where I looked out at a near-empty audience. Yet all along there had been eyes watching me, rooting for me, from their own bedrooms, cars, stairwells, and apartments, all of us shielded inside our pain, our fear, our anonymity. I was surrounded by survivors, I was part of a we. They had never been tricked into seeing me as a minor character, a mute body; I was the leader on the front line fighting, with an entire infantry behind me. They had been waiting for me to find justice. This victory would be celebrated quietly in rooms in towns in states I had never been to. For so long, I’d imagined myself wandering across a dry, empty plain. This card was the puddle. The realization that just below the surface, more water led to streams to rivers to oceans. That this was only the beginning. I was not alone. They had found me.” Miller gets political in this memoir too, which is unsurprising given how intertwined her individual experience is to the political realities surrounding sexual assault and misogyny in the United States. She calls out the legal system for its awful treatment of survivors, she gently yet firmly describes Stanford’s complicity and refusal to take action on behalf of survivors, and she acknowledges her own Asian American identity that often got erased when the media described her as Emily Doe. Again, Miller’s skill as a memoirist shows, as she incorporates commentary about these broader systemic injustices while still sticking close to her truth and her own story. As the feminist rallying cry goes, the personal is political, and Miller writes with precision and power about how the political landscape surrounding sexual violence affected her, as well as how she herself altered the political landscape through her own perseverance and courage. Overall, I recommend this memoir to literally every human on this planet. Again, I cried several times, mostly in reaction to Miller’s profound pain, perseverance, and power. While Miller does not go into the details of her assault, some parts of this book may be triggering for those with similar trauma and assault-related experiences. Though I was not sexually assaulted, I found Miller’s voice and experiences a healing salve in my own journey with PTSD. I can only hope that this book goes down as a classic. Thank you to Chanel Miller for your voice and your courage. I’ll end the review with the last passage in the memoir, a testament to Miller’s beautiful heart: “I survived because I remained soft, because I listened, because I wrote. Because I huddled close to my truth, protected it like a tiny flame in a terrible storm. Hold up your head when the tears come, when you are mocked, insulted, questioned, threatened, when they tell you you are nothing, when your body is reduced to openings. The journey will be longer than you imagined, trauma will find you again and again. Do not become the ones who hurt you. Stay tender with your power. Never fight to injure, fight to uplift. Fight because you know that in this life, you deserve safety, joy, and freedom. Fight because it is your life. Not anyone else’s. I did it, I am here. Looking back, all the ones who doubted or hurt or nearly conquered me faded away, and I am the only one standing. So now, the time has come. I dust myself off, and go on.”

  3. 4 out of 5

    jessica

    ‘i am a victim, i have no qualms with this word, only with the idea that it is all that i am.’ previously known as emily doe when her victim impact statement was released, chanel miller reclaims her name and identity, proving that she is more than just a victim, in this powerful and (heartbreakingly) necessary memoir. this is one of the most difficult books i have ever read. i was completely beside myself, not just because of the sensitive content, but because of the injustice of it all. ‘i am a victim, i have no qualms with this word, only with the idea that it is all that i am.’ previously known as emily doe when her victim impact statement was released, chanel miller reclaims her name and identity, proving that she is more than just a victim, in this powerful and (heartbreakingly) necessary memoir. this is one of the most difficult books i have ever read. i was completely beside myself, not just because of the sensitive content, but because of the injustice of it all. i cant even begin to describe the depth of my anger and hatred towards the unfair treatment sexual assault victims receive. ‘my pain was never more valuable than his potential.’ this sentence should NEVER be someones reality. and the grace with which chanel copes with and elegantly narrates such an unfathomable trauma is truly inspiring. it shows us that we must do better, we must be better, in a society that so corruptly mistreats survivors of sexual assault. for those of you who have suffered sexual assault and have been failed or discredited by a system that is suppose to protect you - you matter, you are believed, your life is just as important as anyone elses, and you are not defined by the worst thing that has happened to you. you are more than just a victim. ↠ 5 stars

  4. 5 out of 5

    Chelsea (chelseadolling reads)

    Absolutely fucking incredible.

  5. 4 out of 5

    emma

    Everyone, everyone, everyone should read this book. That's my review.

  6. 4 out of 5

    Gabby

    “You took away My worth, my privacy, My energy, My time, My safety, My intimacy, My confidence, My own voice, Until today.” This story is fucking incredible, moving, brilliant. I don't really have words to describe how this story moved me and how I think it's one of the best of the year and how everyone needs to read this. It's the true story of Chanel Miller, a girl who was raped behind a dumpster on Stanford's campus in 2015. I was moved to tears many times while reading this because I can't imagine th “You took away My worth, my privacy, My energy, My time, My safety, My intimacy, My confidence, My own voice, Until today.” This story is fucking incredible, moving, brilliant. I don't really have words to describe how this story moved me and how I think it's one of the best of the year and how everyone needs to read this. It's the true story of Chanel Miller, a girl who was raped behind a dumpster on Stanford's campus in 2015. I was moved to tears many times while reading this because I can't imagine the pain, the suffering and the horror of dealing with something like this. The way she describes the rigorous court process and how nobody believes you - they will question every little thing about you and what you were wearing or how much you were drinking and make you feel guilty because "he had so much potential" and you are "ruining his future" when he should be the one feeling guilty and ughhh. It was just so powerful and it made me feel such rage over how unfair the world is. Chanel Miller is so brave for sharing her story. "Victims exist in a society that tells us our purpose is to be an inspiring story. But sometimes the best we can do is tell you we’re still here, and that should be enough. Denying darkness does not bring anyone closer to the light. When you hear a story about rape, all the graphic and unsettling details, resist the instinct to turn away; instead look closer, because beneath the gore and the police reports is a whole, beautiful person, looking for ways to be in the world again." “My pain was never more valuable than his potential.” “They seemed angry that I’d made myself vulnerable, more than the fact that he’d acted on my vulnerability” “Most of us understand that your future is not promised to you. It is constructed day by day, through the choices you make. Your future is earned, little by little, through hard work and action. If you don’t act accordingly, that dream dissolves.” I really love this quote about consent and how we shouldn't assume the answer is yes until they are told no: “When a woman is assaulted, one of the first questions people ask is, Did you say no? This question assumes that the answer was always yes, and that it is her job to revoke the agreement. To defuse the bomb she was given. But why are they allowed to touch us until we physically fight them off? Why is the door open until we have to slam it shut?” “Cosby, 60. Weinstein, 87. Nassar, 169. The news used phrases like avalanche of accusations, tsunami of stories, sea change. The metaphors were correct in that they were catastrophic, devastating. But it was wrong to compare them to natural disasters, for they were not natural at all, solely man-made. Call it a tsunami, but do not lose sight of the fact that each life is a single drop, how many drops it took to make a single wave. The loss is incomprehensible, staggering, maddening—we should have caught it when it was no more than a drip. Instead society is flooded with survivors coming forward, dozens for every man, just so that one day, in his old age, he might feel a taste of what it was like for them all along.” This book was a heavy, sad read that is so honest it breaks your heart, but it is so relevant and so important and one of the best nonfiction books I have ever read.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Lindsay - Traveling Sisters Book Reviews

    4+ stars! Powerful. Shocking. Emotional. Upsetting. Inspiring. Life changing. This is the memoir of an extremely admirable, inspiring and empowering young woman who has given a voice to countless sexual assault victims. Chanel Miller was sexually assaulted behind a dumpster on a prestigious college campus in 2015. This is her journey of fighting for her voice to be heard which in turn gives courage and strength to so many others. This book is undeniably powerful. I don’t believe there is a person 4+ stars! Powerful. Shocking. Emotional. Upsetting. Inspiring. Life changing. This is the memoir of an extremely admirable, inspiring and empowering young woman who has given a voice to countless sexual assault victims. Chanel Miller was sexually assaulted behind a dumpster on a prestigious college campus in 2015. This is her journey of fighting for her voice to be heard which in turn gives courage and strength to so many others. This book is undeniably powerful. I don’t believe there is a person who could read this and not be affected. The facts are stomach churning. What Chanel went through is unbelievable. One of the hardest hitting points for me to wrap my mind around was how vulnerable and uninformed Chanel was kept along the process of the court proceedings. She wasn’t made to feel truly supported by the college or courts throughout the investigation. How many other victims are out there who have been left alone “in the dark” to grieve and hide away from what happened to them? I hope this book makes it into the hands of people who can change the way sexual assault victims are treated and supported. If I were rating Chanel’s courage and positive impact on our world, 5 stars wouldn’t be enough. My rating for this book is 4+ stars because the middle section did feel a bit drawn out and my attention wavered slightly. I thank and applaud Chanel Miller for writing this stunning book. It took bravery, courage and determination to put her story down on paper for the world to see. It is a novel I will never forget reading. Thank you to my lovely local library for the loan of this outstanding novel.

  8. 5 out of 5

    Holly

    I still remember what a punch to the gut it was to read the victim impact statement from "Emily Doe" at Brock Turner's sentencing. Despite the fact that Brock Turner was actually caught in the act of sexually assaulting her, and despite the fact that he was found unanimously guilty on three separate charges, the judge presiding over his sentencing gave Turner only a 6 month sentence which really equated to a 3 month sentence due to time for 'good behavior'. The injustice of it all still burns d I still remember what a punch to the gut it was to read the victim impact statement from "Emily Doe" at Brock Turner's sentencing. Despite the fact that Brock Turner was actually caught in the act of sexually assaulting her, and despite the fact that he was found unanimously guilty on three separate charges, the judge presiding over his sentencing gave Turner only a 6 month sentence which really equated to a 3 month sentence due to time for 'good behavior'. The injustice of it all still burns deeply. So when I heard that Emily Doe was now coming forward and had written a book about her experiences, I knew I had to read it (or actually, listen to it - she narrates the audiobook). This book is a heartfelt look into the trauma of sexual assault and the justice system. You really get an insight into how an ordinary day and a spur of the moment decision to attend a party with a younger sibling quickly turned into a nightmare that lasted for years and completely upturned her life. I cried so much while reading this book, in part because this could have so easily happened to me or any of my friends or loved ones. Chanel is not unique in having inadvertently drunk too much one night - she was not some out of control party girl, she was a typical college graduate with a full time job and a loving boyfriend. The usual repercussions of a single night of alcoholic excess is a terrible hangover - not being dragged outside behind a dumpster where no one could find her, having her underwear removed, and her vagina penetrated by a complete stranger's fingers. But really, that was only the beginning of her trauma as the court system moved slowly, the press caught wind of the story, and she was forced to repeatedly defend herself. My only qualms about this book are found in the chapters that take place after Turner's sentencing. Chanel briefly touches on other well-known incidents of injustice outside of her specific case, and some of those are less relevant and insightful than others, and their inclusion felt a little page-filler-y. But overall I would recommend this book.

  9. 5 out of 5

    Mehrsa

    I'm going to be honest. This book was hard to get through. Not because of the topic, but because it was too long and too repetitive. I really respect Chanel Miller and I cannot believe how lucidly she analyzes her rape, the trial, and everything that followed. Like everyone else, I knew all the facts here, but her analysis is insightful. Still, I wish her editor had helped cut out some of the chapters that were superfluous.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Nenia ⚔️ Queen of Villainy ⚔️ Campbell

    Instagram || Twitter || Facebook || Amazon || Pinterest Usually, I can finish a book in just a few hours. This book took me over twenty days to read. Reading it was a highly unpleasant, emotionally exhausting experience, and I kept having to put it aside. Chanel Miller, in case you don't know who she is, is the woman who was sexually assaulted by Brock Turner whose victim impact statement went viral when she was still "Jane Doe." Like many other women, I was following that trial closely and w Instagram || Twitter || Facebook || Amazon || Pinterest Usually, I can finish a book in just a few hours. This book took me over twenty days to read. Reading it was a highly unpleasant, emotionally exhausting experience, and I kept having to put it aside. Chanel Miller, in case you don't know who she is, is the woman who was sexually assaulted by Brock Turner whose victim impact statement went viral when she was still "Jane Doe." Like many other women, I was following that trial closely and was shocked and disgusted at how many people leaped to Turner's defense because he was a Stanford boi and a good swimmer, whereas the girl he attacked was drunk and wearing a dress. When Chanel Miller revealed her identity, the fact that she was a person of color and he was white added a whole new layer of discrimination to an already heinous and unforgivable act. Chanel Miller is brave. Not just for writing this book (although, also that), but for confronting her attacker, for facing him in court, for undergoing the rape kit test, for doing everything she did while trying to get herself some justice. She was brave for making it through her horrible ordeal, for her poise when internet commenters tried to tear her down. She was brave for owning her life and trying to reclaim herself. KNOW MY NAME gives the details of the night as Miller remembers it, as well as some of the accounts from people who remember the parts of it she didn't. In KNOW, we get to know Chanel Miller as a person, apart from her attack, and how the assault, the shock, the trial, and its aftermath affected her. The trial is honestly one of the hardest parts to read. I started crying in some parts because I was so angry for her. When the defense tried to play her off as some silly little girl, I wanted to scream. Her outrage at Trump's infamous "grab 'em by the pussy" statement, and how horrifically similar it was to her own attacker's cavalier attitude toward women and consent, was truly nauseating, and reflected the outrage a lot of survivors felt at seeing that boor take office. There are also a few bright spots. Joe Biden wrote her a touching letter. Hillary Clinton used a quote from Miller's statement in her memoir, WHAT HAPPENED. Many women spoke out in support of her, and her family and boyfriend were so lovely and wonderful in how unequivocally they stood by her side. I also got that sense that she felt powerfully vindicated by the #MeToo movement and seeing so many women come forward, even though the sheer number has grievous implications on how we, as a society, protect victims from abusers and prevent infrastructure that facilitates abuse. So, after all this, I'm sure you're wondering-- if the book is THAT important, why only three stars? Because this book is so weighty, so harrowing, so dark, reading it made me feel incredibly shitty. And while I think that shitty feeling is something to hold on to, and think about, and remember whenever a woman comes forward about her abuser, I really did not enjoy the book all that much. I'm giving it three stars because I loved the message and that Miller felt like she could share it-- and herself-- with us, and I liked the writing style, but this is not a book that should be read for pleasure, and I would strongly encourage rape and sexual assault survivors to read this with caution, as it contains many potential triggers that I think could be incredibly upsetting. Like other critical reviewers of this memoir, I also felt that it was long and unevenly paced. I get that real life does not always move linearly like a story and that a sexual assault survivor shouldn't have to edit or "censor" their account to benefit the public, but as a reader, the length made it very difficult to get through, especially considering the heaviness of the content. I definitely think this memoir should be read by many others, but please make sure you're in the right mental space to do so. I'm glad Chanel Miller told us her name. 3 stars

  11. 5 out of 5

    Hannah Greendale

    An unflinching and triumphant testimony. Know My Name ought to be required reading. I always wondered why survivors understood other survivors so well. Why, even if the details of our attacks vary, survivors can lock eyes and get it without having to explain. Perhaps it is not the particulars of the assault itself that we have in common, but the moment after; the first time you are left alone. [...] This moment is not pain, not hysteria, not crying. It is your insides turning to cold stones. An unflinching and triumphant testimony. Know My Name ought to be required reading. I always wondered why survivors understood other survivors so well. Why, even if the details of our attacks vary, survivors can lock eyes and get it without having to explain. Perhaps it is not the particulars of the assault itself that we have in common, but the moment after; the first time you are left alone. [...] This moment is not pain, not hysteria, not crying. It is your insides turning to cold stones. It is utter confusion paired with knowing. Gone is the luxury of growing up slowly. So begins the brutal awakening. - I didn't know that money could make the cell doors swing open. I didn't know that if a woman was drunk when the violence occurred, she wouldn't be taken seriously. I didn't know that if he was drunk when the violence occurred, people would offer him sympathy. I didn't know that my loss of memory would become his opportunity. I didn't know that being a victim was synonymous with not being believed. - They seemed angry that I'd made myself vulnerable, more than the fact that he'd acted on my vulnerability. Drinking is not inherently immoral: a night of heavy drinking calls for Advil and water. But being drunk and raped seemed to call for condemnation.

  12. 5 out of 5

    Brandice

    Know My Name: A Memoir is Chanel Miller’s moving survival story. She was sexually assaulted while unconscious at a Stanford frat party in 2015. Her assaulter was caught in the act by two witnesses and attempted to flee the scene. In an effort to remain anonymous, Chanel was known as Emily Doe throughout the trial. While Turner was found to be guilty, the world (self-included) was stunned to see his sentence be so light, really insignificant — 6 months and released after just 3. This seeming ince Know My Name: A Memoir is Chanel Miller’s moving survival story. She was sexually assaulted while unconscious at a Stanford frat party in 2015. Her assaulter was caught in the act by two witnesses and attempted to flee the scene. In an effort to remain anonymous, Chanel was known as Emily Doe throughout the trial. While Turner was found to be guilty, the world (self-included) was stunned to see his sentence be so light, really insignificant — 6 months and released after just 3. This seeming incel ruined his own future, which his parents and others lamented was now tarnished, nevermind the fact that he unprompted, invaded Chanel’s life, without her consent. He went after Chanel after being rejected by her sister at the party, multiple times that night. ”Verdict of what? Guilt. Guilt for what? Assault. Assault committed by whom? Brock. Your son has broken and shattered your family.” “My advice is, if he’s worried about his reputation, don’t rape anyone.” It was infuriating to read about this! What kind of parents genuinely think their son is too good to be punished for such an atrocious crime and minimize it by referring to it as “just 20 minutes of action”. Parents who by the way, also have a daughter. Know My Name isn’t just about Chanel’s trial though. It is the aftermath, the long-lasting impact on her family — a loving, supportive, close-knit group — boyfriend, and friends. It is her battle to regain a sense of normalcy, have some semblance of peace, and not be shamed for being young and just having a fun night out. ”I did nothing wrong. I am strong. I have a voice. I told the truth.” Chanel is strong, resilient, and has a way with words. I first became aware of her story when her victim impact statement was released following the sentencing. It is included at the end of Know My Name and likely still accessible online, where it went viral once released. ”You have to hold out to see how your life unfolds, because it is most likely beyond what you can imagine. It is not a question of if you will survive this, but what beautiful things await you when you do. I had to believe her, because she was living proof. Then she said, Good and bad things come from the universe holding hands. Wait for the good to come.” Read Know My Name — This story is important.

  13. 5 out of 5

    Elyse Walters

    Audiobook...read by the author, Chanel Miller Chanel wrote an exceptional unflinchingly honest - memoir....with personal gut-wrenching details. I COULD NOT PULL AWAY!!! One does not need to be a victim of sexual assault - to feel its power. Michael Aaron Persky - American attorney and former judge became the first judge to be recalled in California in over 80 years....after international widespread criticism of his ridiculously lenient sentencing — Brock Turner was convicted of three felony charges Audiobook...read by the author, Chanel Miller Chanel wrote an exceptional unflinchingly honest - memoir....with personal gut-wrenching details. I COULD NOT PULL AWAY!!! One does not need to be a victim of sexual assault - to feel its power. Michael Aaron Persky - American attorney and former judge became the first judge to be recalled in California in over 80 years....after international widespread criticism of his ridiculously lenient sentencing — Brock Turner was convicted of three felony charges. He was given only 6 months jail punishment....then served only three months jail time. “Judicial independence is a critical part of the U.S. justice system. The immense power that comes with judicial independence also comes with accountability to the people we serve”. Chanel Miller served the people..... and this was a young shy young woman. “How badly she wanted to feel unfazed”. Ha! Chanel: Thank you for your bravery—telling us your story ‘with’ your real name— and for making a transformational difference in our judicial system! Eloquently written! Sincerely a gifted writer. MUST SAY IT AGAIN... Chanel Miller is a gifted skilled writer ( besides the gut wrenching facts) 5++++ stars

  14. 5 out of 5

    Schizanthus Nerd

    You took away my worth, my privacy, my energy, my time, my safety, my intimacy, my confidence, my own voice, until today. Chanel Miller was raped on Sunday, 18 January 2015. I was raped three days earlier (80 hours before Chanel was, if you take time zones into account). Once I saw that date in print and realised how little time separated our experiences, I couldn’t help but see her story personally. So this is going to be a different review than I would usually write. Feel free to skip the bit You took away my worth, my privacy, my energy, my time, my safety, my intimacy, my confidence, my own voice, until today. Chanel Miller was raped on Sunday, 18 January 2015. I was raped three days earlier (80 hours before Chanel was, if you take time zones into account). Once I saw that date in print and realised how little time separated our experiences, I couldn’t help but see her story personally. So this is going to be a different review than I would usually write. Feel free to skip the bits where I talk about me. Chanel learned what happened to her at the same time as the rest of the world. She was treated in a hospital, endured the indignity of a rape kit and spoke to a detective who believed and didn’t judge her. This sexual assault gained worldwide attention but it was Brock Turner’s name we knew; Chanel’s identity was erased. The trial resulted in guilty verdicts on three counts but, in my view, the punishment did not fit the crime; it may as well have been a slap on the wrist. The detective who ultimately decided I would not step foot in a court room reviewed my statement and asked me, “How is that even possible?!” They didn’t make contact with the man who raped me but did phone my psychologist to ask if I have a mental illness that would cause me to make up something like this and oh, by the way, the description I told the police matched the description I told my psychologist. I also privately reported the rape to two other relevant institutions in the hope that speaking up would prevent this from happening again. Those two institutions told the man who raped me what I had said; this resulted in two threats from him to take legal action against me. For telling the truth. In Australia, where defamation laws are beyond insane. I didn’t follow the story of Chanel’s sexual assault in the media. Even still, I knew the words Standford, rape, swimmer. My introduction to this book was via a publisher’s emailed newsletter, which is how I learn about so many of the books I need to read. I wasn’t sure it was for me though, until I ugly cried my way through I Am With You. I needed to know more about this intelligent, creative woman. Still, I waited patiently for my library to purchase a copy. I made it all the way to page 23 before I finally figured out I needed my own copy, one I could highlight to my heart’s content and return to as often as I needed. I don’t know if I’m more grateful or sad that I found this book so relatable. This is Chanel Miller’s story. Author. Artist. Daughter. Sister. Friend. Girlfriend. Survivor. A woman who has experienced raped, but who is so much more. This is an attempt to transform the hurt inside myself, to confront a past, and find a way to live with and incorporate these memories. I want to leave them behind so I can move forward. In not naming them, I finally name myself. My name is Chanel. I am a victim, I have no qualms with this word, only with the idea that it is all that I am. Although our stories are vastly different, so much of Chanel’s story resonated with me. While I hurt for her and was furious on her behalf as I read about her experiences, I was also lifted by her strength, determination and resilience. I had trouble reading some parts, either because they reminded me too much of my own story or, oddly enough, because they didn’t. I needed to step away and distract myself with a children’s book or play with Lego at times, but my overall takeaway from this book is hope. The hope of words reaching out to me and encouraging me to hold on when difficult times find me: You have to hold out to see how your life unfolds, because it is most likely beyond what you can imagine. It is not a question of if you will survive this, but what beautiful things await you when you do. The hope that comes in the form of a narrative that doesn’t sugar coat what recovery from trauma looks and feels like: As a survivor, I feel a duty to provide a realistic view of the complexity of recovery. The hope that therapy can offer: It feels better when the story is outside myself. Although I don’t know Chanel I feel like I got to know her as I read her story; this is a woman I would want to be friends with. I loved being introduced to Chanel’s family and friends, and want to personally thank every single person who has supported, encouraged and validated her. My heart grew several sizes as I read about professionals who exuded empathy and compassion. Sure, there were others I wanted to slap, but the ones who went above and beyond reminded me that there are people out there who can soften the blow when trauma finds you. Chanel truly is a writer. She can paint a scene so vivid that I felt I was inside it. She took me on an emotional journey with her; I may have felt it more because I was revisiting my own at the same time but I think I would have felt the highs and lows regardless. I want to recommend this book to everyone, but especially to those whose professions bring them into contact with victims of sexual assault, whose responses can either provide validation or add to the trauma. This book does not have a happy ending. The happy part is there is no ending, because I’ll always find a way to keep going. If I were Chanel I don’t think I would ever want to read another word written about me. I’m just so proud of her though. Chanel, if you ever read this, please know that I believe you and I am with you. Although I’ve never attempted anything like what Chanel has accomplished here I have needed to write statements that include the details of sexual assault and know how impossible it can feel both to find the right words and to revisit memories with sharp edges. Chanel has done an incredible job and I’m really look forward to reading whatever she writes in the future. Content warnings include mention of suicide and sexual assault. If you need support or information relating to sexual assault, you can contact: * RAINN (America) - www.rainn.org - chat online or call 800.656.HOPE * 1800RESPECT (Australia) - www.1800respect.org.au - chat online or call 1800 737 732 You can also search for resources in over a hundred countries at: * HotPeachPages - www.hotpeachpages.net Please know that it was not your fault, you are not alone and I believe you. 💜

  15. 5 out of 5

    Sana

    I still remember reading her statement back in 2016 and the feelings it evoked so I cannot even imagine how much more powerful and impactful this would be

  16. 4 out of 5

    Jennifer

    Can't say enough good things about this one. More thoughts about it here: https://openlettersreview.com/posts/k... Can't say enough good things about this one. More thoughts about it here: https://openlettersreview.com/posts/k...

  17. 5 out of 5

    BookOfCinz

    Updated November 20, 2019. I decided to read Know My Name for BookOfCinz November read because I felt it beyond important. I have no words. I was moved to tears and anger so many times while reading this book. I don't know why in the year 2019 women are still fighting this battle. Chanel Miller is one brave woman, I can not even begin to imagine or put into word her bravery. I have so much to say, but I feel like its been said already by much more eloquent persons. I do recommend EVERYONE especia Updated November 20, 2019. I decided to read Know My Name for BookOfCinz November read because I felt it beyond important. I have no words. I was moved to tears and anger so many times while reading this book. I don't know why in the year 2019 women are still fighting this battle. Chanel Miller is one brave woman, I can not even begin to imagine or put into word her bravery. I have so much to say, but I feel like its been said already by much more eloquent persons. I do recommend EVERYONE especially men read this book. This required reading and I wish everyone who picks up this book learns from it and do their part. The judge had given Brock something that would never be extended to me: empathy. Why this book is important.

  18. 5 out of 5

    Terri

    Chanel Miller has written her painful story and it is one of the best examples of exactly what a rape victim has to endure. Bravo. It's brilliantly written. I can't believe she had the courage to write such a book but THANK GOD she did. I look forward to reading her next book. Highly recommend.

  19. 5 out of 5

    NAT.orious reads ☽

    5 STARS ★★★★★ This book is for everyone. ⤐ Preface. I just talked about this book with a friend this week who's just read it. The scope of this book is incredible. Undeniably hits home for me personally but also sparked an interesting conversation about what we need to fix in this society. Victim blaming has to stop, in every situation. I am not at fault when disgusting men leer at me or worse. You are not at fold when that cop harasses you for no reason. When I finished this a coupl 5 STARS ★★★★★ This book is for everyone. ⤐ Preface. I just talked about this book with a friend this week who's just read it. The scope of this book is incredible. Undeniably hits home for me personally but also sparked an interesting conversation about what we need to fix in this society. Victim blaming has to stop, in every situation. I am not at fault when disgusting men leer at me or worse. You are not at fold when that cop harasses you for no reason. When I finished this a couple of days ago, I had the feeling I needed to let my reading experience sit for a while and collect myself before sharing my thought. I now regret that choice. I should have written it straight away, letting it all out; the pain, the sorrow, the anguish, the reassurance, the joy, the determination. This book and Chanel - wonderful Chanel - earn much more than what I am able to give them now, 5 days after finishing one of the most impactful reads of my life. The recent pandemic has messed up my mental composition and my life in general, the ADD ain't happy. I hope to be a Swede should the moment ever arise. Do not be like the people who watched me and my nightmare man, pretending not to see what was going on, those 12+ years ago. If something looks wrong, it probably is. Trust your instincts. Trust those of others. Listen. Believe. Only enthusiastic consent in the form of a 'yes' means yes. Everything else is a no. ⤐ Overall. It says 'enjoyability = 5*' at the end of this review, and although I'm all sure you know what this means, I still need to say it: It was excruciatingly painful to get through some of the pages of this book. At some point in the reading process, I predicted I would close this book, anger guiding my hands. But instead, I find tears burning in my throat and awe wettening my eyes. I found solidarity, light and love amongst the darkness. I'd be lying if I didn't say this wasn't triggering for me, but it proved, if nothing else, that I'm stronger than I thought myself to be. It got an honorary place in my book-arrangement. I will see, truly see, Chanel every day. ⤐ What’s happening. On January 18, 2015, Brock Turner, the rapist, raped a woman on Stanford campus. Although insulted, humiliated and dragged through the mud by him, his family and everybody who didn't believe her, she remained without a name for a long time. ‘This is an attempt to transform the hurt inside myself, to confront a past, and find a way to live with and incorporate these memories. I want to leave them behind so I can move forward. In not naming them, I finally name myself. My name is Chanel.’ Chanel took the amazingly brave and difficult step to go against the rapist in court. And although this time she was given the chance to say 'no', what followed, was assault all over. Chanel didn't know it would take three years and eight months for this case to be over and her healing process to start. ‘I didn’t know this little yes would reopen my body, would rub the cuts raw, would pry my legs open for the public. […] My three-letter word that morning unlocked a future, one in which I would become twenty-three and twenty-four and twenty-five and twenty-six before the case would be closed. [...] The saddest things about these cases, beyond the crimes themselves, are the degrading things the victim begins to believe about her being. [...] They seemed angry that I’d made myself vulnerable, more than the fact that he’d acted on my vulnerability. Drinking is not inherently immoral: a night of heavy drinking calls for Advil and water. But being drunk and raped seemed to call for condemnation. People were confounded that I had failed to protect myself. [...] When a victim does go for help, she is seen as attacking the assailant. These are separate; seeking aid is her primary motive, his fallout is a secondary effect. But we are taught if you speak, something bad happens to him. You will be blamed for every job he doesn’t get, every game he doesn’t play.’ While Chanel has an awful lot to contribute to the discussion of rape culture in general, there's also an underlying truth about what it means to be a woman on this planet in general: ‘What if you’re assaulted and you didn’t already belong to a male? Was having a boyfriend the only way to have your autonomy respected? [...] Women have been trained to notice micromovements, to scan and anticipate all subsequent action, constantly measuring how far threating words are from realities. We are tasked with defending ourselves in every imaginable scenario, planning escape routes, walking with keys between knuckles, a natural instinct in our day-to-day routine.’ _____________________ writing quality + easy of reading = 5* structure = 4* enjoyability = 5* insightfulness = 5*

  20. 5 out of 5

    Cathrine ☯️

    5 ⚖️ ⚖️ ⚖️ ⚖️ ⚖️ When you’re a young male Stanford swimming star they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab 'em by the pussy. You can do anything. When you’re the unconscious female victim it’s your fault. You’re guilty until proven innocent. While you’re being assaulted all over again in court be aware of what behavior is acceptable from you: "Don’t get angry. If you’re angry you’re defensive. If you’re flat you’re apathetic. Too upbeat, you’re suspect. If you weep, you’re hysterical. Being too emo 5 ⚖️ ⚖️ ⚖️ ⚖️ ⚖️ When you’re a young male Stanford swimming star they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab 'em by the pussy. You can do anything. When you’re the unconscious female victim it’s your fault. You’re guilty until proven innocent. While you’re being assaulted all over again in court be aware of what behavior is acceptable from you: "Don’t get angry. If you’re angry you’re defensive. If you’re flat you’re apathetic. Too upbeat, you’re suspect. If you weep, you’re hysterical. Being too emotional made you unreliable. But being unemotional made you unaffected." Excellent and eye opening. Just about everyone should read or listen to Chanel’s story. Highly recommend the audio read by her.

  21. 5 out of 5

    Rachel Reads Ravenously

    Nonfiction November is a month long reading initiative that challenges you to read four or more nonfiction books during the month of November. 5 stars This is the powerful memoir of Chanel Miller, also known as Emily Doe, the woman who was sexually assaulted by Brock Turner. In this book Chanel details the events surrounding her trial and after, and the impact this sexual assault had on her life. The entire book my heart went out to this young woman for the unfairness of everything that happene Nonfiction November is a month long reading initiative that challenges you to read four or more nonfiction books during the month of November. 5 stars This is the powerful memoir of Chanel Miller, also known as Emily Doe, the woman who was sexually assaulted by Brock Turner. In this book Chanel details the events surrounding her trial and after, and the impact this sexual assault had on her life. The entire book my heart went out to this young woman for the unfairness of everything that happened to her. I listened to the audiobook of this, which is read by Chanel. There were a couple of times when I was listening on my commute when I began to cry. My heart broke for this woman and everything she went through. This book is the must read book of the decade. You must read it and hear her story. Follow me on ♥ Facebook ♥ Blog ♥ Instagram ♥ Twitter ♥

  22. 4 out of 5

    Elaine Mullane || At Home in Books

    This is one of the most powerful books I have ever read. It has completely reshaped my thinking around sexual assault and how we exist in a world whose institutions are built to protect men - particularly privileged men - and one that fails to protect the most vulnerable. This is the memoir of Chanel Miller, or "Emily Doe", as she was known during her trial. At the age of 22, Chanel was sexually assaulted on Stanford's campus when she was attending a frat party with her sister and her sister's f This is one of the most powerful books I have ever read. It has completely reshaped my thinking around sexual assault and how we exist in a world whose institutions are built to protect men - particularly privileged men - and one that fails to protect the most vulnerable. This is the memoir of Chanel Miller, or "Emily Doe", as she was known during her trial. At the age of 22, Chanel was sexually assaulted on Stanford's campus when she was attending a frat party with her sister and her sister's friend. Brock Turner, a 19-year-old Stanford student, was convicted of the assault, but was sentenced to just six months in county jail for his crime, excused for the most part by the apparent looming "promise" of his academic career and future in swimming. At her trial, Chanel read her victim impact statement, which was later posted to BuzzFeed (under the name "Emily Doe"), garnering 11 million views in just four days. It went on to be read in congress; it was quoted by Hilary Clinton; it changed California law and helped women all over the world to come forward and share their stories of assault. In Know My Name, the flesh and blood woman behind the name "Emily Doe" comes into the light for the first time, sharing the story of the assault and its aftermath, the court case, her feelings on the verdict, and the journey of healing she has been on since. Not only is this book exceptionally well written, but as a first-person account of sexual assault it is critical for our time. It is not without emotion - in fact, it is exceptionally moving - but it is written with such measure, such control, and such clarity, I was dumbfounded by its power. This book deserves every bit of praise it has received. Chanel Miller is intelligent, witty, brave, fair and kind. Her story is one of resilience, transcendence and recovery, and living a full and wonderful life after trauma. It is about finding and using your voice, speaking out until you are heard, and always believing that once you are fighting for what is right, you are never wrong. Every student in every school should be asked to read this book, and every parent should talk about with their children. In fact, it is essential reading for everyone.

  23. 4 out of 5

    Rachel

    Chanel Miller’s memoir Know My Name is aptly titled; the name Brock Turner is known by most Americans who watch the news, while Miller was known for years only as ‘Emily Doe,’ the nameless, faceless girl that he attempted to rape at a Stanford frat party in January 2015. Turner’s case gained notoriety after his sentencing where he received only 6 months of prison time – he only served 3 – and Miller’s victim impact statement was published to Buzzfeed, receiving millions of hits and sparking conv Chanel Miller’s memoir Know My Name is aptly titled; the name Brock Turner is known by most Americans who watch the news, while Miller was known for years only as ‘Emily Doe,’ the nameless, faceless girl that he attempted to rape at a Stanford frat party in January 2015. Turner’s case gained notoriety after his sentencing where he received only 6 months of prison time – he only served 3 – and Miller’s victim impact statement was published to Buzzfeed, receiving millions of hits and sparking conversations about sexual assault on college campuses, as well as the lenient sentences that privileged young men receive. In September 2019, Miller finally broke her anonymity, appearing on 60 Minutes and publishing this memoir. Miller’s memoir isn’t only extraordinary for the fact that, for female victims, putting yourself out there necessarily means abuse, dismissal, and violated privacy; it’s extraordinary because it is a damn good book. It’s clear-eyed while still being pointed and righteously furious; it’s razor-sharp and compassionate in equal measure; it’s deeply personal and macrocosmic all at once. This memoir highlights the impact and recovery process for sexual assault, with Miller stressing that it isn’t a simple road with a happy ending. That said, she wants to make it clear that she writes for victims above all others, hoping her honesty will touch others who have lived through similar horrors. Know My Name is an accomplished, impressively self-aware piece of writing that I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend to everyone who can stomach the subject matter. (I listened to the audiobook which Miller herself narrates, and I cannot recommend that highly enough.)

  24. 4 out of 5

    Rincey

    Just as great as everyone says it is. Watch my full review: https://youtu.be/zIdJ1gqIozQ Just as great as everyone says it is. Watch my full review: https://youtu.be/zIdJ1gqIozQ

  25. 5 out of 5

    April (Aprilius Maximus)

    “You have to hold out to see how your life unfolds, because it is most likely beyond what you can imagine. It is not a question of if you will survive this, but what beautiful things await you when you do.” ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* 5 s t a r s *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ One of the most powerful, well-written memoirs I've ever read and one I will definitely be purchasing for my shelves. “What we needed to raise in others was this instinct. The ability to recognize, in an instant, right from wrong. The clarity of mind to “You have to hold out to see how your life unfolds, because it is most likely beyond what you can imagine. It is not a question of if you will survive this, but what beautiful things await you when you do.” ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* 5 s t a r s *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ One of the most powerful, well-written memoirs I've ever read and one I will definitely be purchasing for my shelves. “What we needed to raise in others was this instinct. The ability to recognize, in an instant, right from wrong. The clarity of mind to face it rather than ignore it. I learned that before they had chased Brock, they had checked on me. Masculinity is often defined by physicality, but that initial kneeling is as powerful as the leg sweep, the tackling. Masculinity is found in the vulnerability, the crying.” trigger warnings: sexual assault, rape.

  26. 4 out of 5

    Alysha DeShaé

    2019.09.25 I've calmed down a bit since I wrote my very short letter/review to Chanel last night. I'm still raw and emotional, though, but I feel that I managed to type up something a little more like a review. But how do you review a book like this? "I liked the part where she talked about how painful everything is." What? Really?! Like, it's all painful! And you liked it? Geez, okay. ... See? It's hard. It's especially hard when you know exactly how hard it is to come forward with something like 2019.09.25 I've calmed down a bit since I wrote my very short letter/review to Chanel last night. I'm still raw and emotional, though, but I feel that I managed to type up something a little more like a review. But how do you review a book like this? "I liked the part where she talked about how painful everything is." What? Really?! Like, it's all painful! And you liked it? Geez, okay. ... See? It's hard. It's especially hard when you know exactly how hard it is to come forward with something like this. It's even harder when you realize that you don't know how hard it was to live through her experience because maybe you weren't as brave as she was. So, below is my attempt at a proper review. I'm leaving my letter at the bottom because maybe Chanel will read it. Maybe it will bring her a smile to know that she helped just one more person. Maybe, just maybe, it will help her. She talks about the internet comments she would read during the trial and then about the comments she saw when her victim statement was published. Maybe she's still reading the comments. And if so, Chanel, again, thank you. ----- So everyone remembers #StanfordRapistBrockTurner, right? And how the victim was often just "unconscious woman" or Emily Doe because she wanted to remain anonymous? The woman he attacked is no longer anonymous. Her name is Chanel Miller. She is a badass survivor and a personal hero of mine. Chanel has also written a book about the entire experience. The book is painful, raw, heartbreaking, and hard to read. I cried through the majority of it. I broke down completely through the last third of the book. Ugly crying. Sobbing. Screaming. I had a panic attack. Some survivors may want to avoid this book. But so many more will, I believe, feel empowered by Chanel's words. Reading her account of everything (from the day of the party through her attacker's release from jail through the aftermath of it all) is cathartic, in a way. Chanel definitely describes every aspect of everything she can. There are graphic details in this book. They are painful and ugly and hard to hear. They are what Chanel deals with daily. They are what other survivors deal with every second of their lives. I firmly believe that if you think you're the kind of person who doesn't need to read this book that you're the kind of person who needs to read it the most. If you care about victims' and women's rights, you need to read this book. Chanel Miller used the fuck out of her voice and it's the best thing I've seen in a while. ----- 2019.09.24 To Chanel Miller: I cannot properly review your book at the moment. It's powerful. It's brutal. It's necessary. It's hard. It's raw. But you know all this. You must know this. Your writing is perfect. Your own voice is brilliant. I ugly cried and loudly sobbed through the last third of your book. It hurt. It ripped open old wounds and triggered a panic attack at one point. There is so much that I can't bring myself talk about, but your words helped. Thank you. Just, thank you.

  27. 4 out of 5

    Jeanette (Again)

    American women have made great progress in many respects since 1971 when Helen Reddy sang: “I am woman, hear me roar, in numbers too big to ignore.” But no matter how much we roar, we still can’t seem to get any real traction when it comes to sexual assault and harassment. When women seek justice, the man is often seen as the victim. The woman is vilified and blamed. How dare she try to ruin his reputation and derail him from his career path? She shouldn’t have been drinking. She shouldn’t have b American women have made great progress in many respects since 1971 when Helen Reddy sang: “I am woman, hear me roar, in numbers too big to ignore.” But no matter how much we roar, we still can’t seem to get any real traction when it comes to sexual assault and harassment. When women seek justice, the man is often seen as the victim. The woman is vilified and blamed. How dare she try to ruin his reputation and derail him from his career path? She shouldn’t have been drinking. She shouldn’t have been dressed that way. She shouldn’t have gone outside alone. She shouldn’t have gone into a room with him alone. As if a man has no will or agency of his own. The attitude is essentially, “She made him do it, and therefore he should not be punished." Either that, or “She’s lying. We know him and he would never do that.” So here we sit in 2019, feeling like the outlook is bleak for our little sisters coming up in the world. And yet there is reason for hope. With her bold and potent voice and considerable writing chops, Chanel Miller speaks out for women down through millennia who have been debased and degraded and had their lives permanently altered by sexual abuse and assault. She didn't ask for this task, but she rose to the occasion to say, in effect, I am not 'Emily Doe.' I am Chanel Miller. I will not let myself and my womanhood be defined by the media, or social media, or Brock Turner, or the ass-backwards wrong-side-up judicial system. I will not disappear. I will not be silenced. Hear me roar. With almost surgical precision, Miller dissects every event associated with the night she was attacked by Brock Turner outside a frat house at Stanford University. She has a gift for storytelling and a remarkable ability to find words for emotions we have all felt but couldn't find a way to express. We become witness to the details of a victim's life, details that are usually kept private out of shame or fear or embarrassment. Chanel's life was turned inside out by the assault, the trial, and the media coverage. She bounced around a lot, hopping back and forth from coast to coast, just trying to hold her life together. At the time I'm sure it felt chaotic for her to be zinging around like a fart in a skillet, but she was doing exactly what she needed to do to nourish her soul while hanging in limbo awaiting justice. She relied heavily on her boyfriend Lucas, who deserves the medal for Most Supportive Boyfriend. Lesser men would have dumped her and said, "I didn't sign up for this." Miller is also blessed with a supportive family who gave her the space and time she needed to regain her balance. Her Chinese mother fled the Cultural Revolution, and she is a model of strength and optimism for her daughter. We who have had our lives dramatically altered by physical or emotional trauma want desperately for people to know who we were before the events that changed us forever. We feel like others cannot fully know who we are now unless they understand who we were before. We want to say,“This isn’t me, this person you see before you. I was outgoing, I was athletic, I was fun, I was adventuresome, I was playful, I was fearless, I was full of the dickens, I was always on the go.I’m not this thing that misfortune has made of me.” Chanel wants us to know all those things about who she was before the assault, and so there’s an autobiography, of sorts, deftly woven into the story. This structure provides some light relief when the post-trauma circumstances start to weigh heavy on the reader. Shortly after I finished reading this book, I just happened to catch a brief news segment about a young lady named Abby Honold. She was raped at age nineteen at the University of Minnesota. When she reported it, the cops laughed at her and didn't take it seriously. When the cops dropped the charges after a few days, Abby outed her rapist on a blog post. Other women came forward and said he had assaulted them also. Daniel Drill-Mellum was re-arrested and pled guilty to two counts. Now, at age twenty-four, Honold is promoting the Abby Honold Act, which would require that police and other professionals be properly trained to respond to victims of assault and abuse. The courage and fortitude of these two young women gives me at least a glimmer of hope. Could this generation of women, now in their twenties, be the one that brings a sea change? Women are refusing to be erased, diminished, and ignored, as we see with the growing power of the Me Too movement. Am I foolish to believe things can change in any meaningful way? Our measure of progress, or lack thereof, is currently reflected in what we see in Hollywood and Washington, D.C. In Hollywood we have creeps like Harvey Weinstein who have been paying women off for decades to keep them silent, threatening them with loss of career in the movie biz, or worse. In Washington, D.C. we have two credibly accused sexual assaulters/harassers/perjurers sitting on the Supreme Court. One of those men was placed on the Supreme Court by the Sexual Assaulter in Chief currently occupying the White House. This individual in the White House has been credibly accused of sexual assault, including rape, by twenty-four women (and counting). https://www.huffpost.com/entry/a-runn... We have the Access Hollywood video in which he brags about grabbing women by the crotch and getting away with it because “when you’re famous, they let you do it. You can do anything.” This video was made public prior to the 2016 election, as were many of the women’s claims of assault. And yet, millions of American women voted for him, implicitly condoning his utter disregard for and disrespect toward women. Still, we are making progress, inch by inch. More women are running for office, and as we saw in 2018, they win those elections. More women at all levels of government, as well as brave survivors like Chanel and Abby, send a message to girls and women everywhere that they deserve better. If we persevere, we can join our voices until the roar really is too big to ignore. So roar on, Chanel. We see you, we hear you, we know your name. And we are grateful. And now, ladies and gentlemen, Miss Helen Reddy, with an anthem for women everywhere: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rptW7...

  28. 4 out of 5

    Kristy K

    Be ready to cry, rage, and cry again. Miller’s story is heartbreaking and inspirational at the same time. I am so proud and in awe of this Emily Doe taking her name and story back. Highly recommend.

  29. 5 out of 5

    Lisa

    Miller eloquently cuts right through the bullshit. Know My Name is a scathing account of her rape and the trauma she was continuously subjected to by the legal system and Stanford administration. This book made me furious. Read it. Miller is an inspiration and an excellent writer.

  30. 4 out of 5

    Katharine

    Wow. One of the most powerful books I've read. Her honesty, vulnerability, and strength... I am in awe. It is both brutal and beautiful and should be read by all. Thank you to Viking for providing me with a free review copy. All opinions are my own.

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